If It Kills Me
by sadladybug
Summary: Zutara. It all begins with a misunderstanding on the patio of Uncle's tea shop. A heartbroken Zuko returns to the palace, without knowing that Katara has followed him. Meanwhile, trouble brews in the Northern Earth Kingdom. Chapter 5 now up! Please R&R!
1. Prologue

"…You won't have to worry about your destiny any more. Because I will make sure your destiny ends, right then and there. Permanently."

Zuko lay on his bed in his room, staring blankly up at the ceiling, reflecting upon the immense changes his life had undergone in a such a short period of time. It had been a few weeks since he had arrived at the Western Air Temple and thrown himself upon the mercy of people he had considered to be his enemies only a short time ago. It hadn't gone well at first, but as soon as they had officially let him into the group, he seemed to fade into the background. Aside from a few strange glances, the members of Team Avatar, as they so ridiculously dubbed themselves, had basically acted as if he had always been there. It was of course awkward if they brought up any stories from the past (that featured him as the villain) while sitting around the fire and eating. In those instances he tried to force his face into something that looked like a smile and let it roll off his back.

Things had even gotten a little easier for him after he went with the Avatar to see the Fire Sages. He had proven that he could in fact be alone with the Avatar, far away from his friends, and return the boy to them unharmed. If that didn't prove his intentions, he wasn't sure what would. It had to be obvious by now that he was on their side, and wasn't still secretly plotting to capture Aang and return him triumphantly to the Fire Lord. It was almost strange that no one seemed to balk at the idea of the two of them going off alone together, although he was sure some people in the group had their doubts.

Especially that waterbender.

She had been eyeballing Zuko ever since he arrived at the Western Air Temple. And not in a good way, either. She was less than ecstatic that Aang had let him join the group, and used pretty much every opportunity to let him know this. Snide verbal comments, sneers, "accidental" soakings, even noticeably smaller portions of food on occasion; he had seen it all from this girl. Zuko was trying very hard to change, and so he tried to ignore this behavior from her. As much as he sometimes wanted to, retaliation was not an option. Particularly after that comment she had made to him upon his arrival. He was taking that threat of hers _very_ seriously. He had seen her fight after all, and he had seen the way the Avatar looked at her. No, fighting back was just not an option. So he just had to take it and hope that she would give up sooner or later.

The truth was, he didn't _want_ to fight with her. Certainly, he wanted to fit in completely with the group, and finally belong somewhere. He was tired of being in an environment that was continuously hostile toward him in one way or another. He really did just want to be at peace for once. But also, he respected her. The waterbender had many qualities that were worthy of respect, and they did not go unnoticed by Zuko. For one, she was an amazingly talented bender. He was genuinely shocked at how much she had improved in such a short time. He remembered the first time he saw her bend, at the side of the river underneath the moon…after which he had promptly tied her to a tree and taunted her with her most prized possession. Zuko almost always flushed at this memory, it was certainly not one of his prouder moments. Then, she was a novice, clearly trying to teach herself, and now, she was a force to be reckoned with. But even with all of that strength, she was still gentle and kind, catering to the group in an almost motherly fashion. Well, to everyone else at least. Not to Zuko.

Zuko wasn't stupid. He did not harbor any illusions about why she was angry with him, or why she didn't trust him. The incident in the crystal catacombs under Ba Sing Se was clearly still very prominent in her mind, and he didn't blame her. This was not one of his proudest moments either. Honestly, he really _was_ trying to connect with her when they were imprisoned together. He was more forthcoming with her than he had been with anyone in a long time. But then the Avatar had come bursting in, casting him weird looks. And then Azula had come in, and dangled something in front of him that he thought he had wanted for a long time. Something he thought would fix everything.

But it didn't fix everything. Instead, it caused him to do something that filled him with shame every time he thought about it. When he thought about it now, it was sad how little resolve he had had. When he tied the waterbender to that tree, and offered her necklace, which meant everything to her, in exchange for information, she did the right thing and refused to betray the loyalty of her friends. When Azula came waltzing in offering lofty promises, he dropped everything and followed her blindly, without regard for his Uncle or anything else. His loyalty was only to himself. Some honorable Prince he was.

But the truth was, he had needed to go home. He had needed to see that what was offered there did not actually make him happy. He needed to see that what he had wanted all along was just a dream, that the reality of going back to the palace was nothing like he imagined it would be. His Uncle had tried to tell him all of this, but he hadn't listened. He had tried for a while, working in Uncle's teashop, but there was that feeling in the back of his mind that something was missing, that he was making the wrong choice, that he needed to go back to the Fire Nation. Going back home cleared all of that up pretty quickly. When he made the decision to join the Avatar and his friends, he had never felt so right about a decision. But if he had joined them when they were all in Ba Sing Se, as his Uncle had wished, he wouldn't have been happy then either. Going back to the palace had erased all doubt from his mind, and allowed him to make decisions with a clear head.

But she didn't know all of that. She just saw him as someone with flimsy loyalty, flip-flopping between sides as it suited him. She didn't even know the reasons that he had wanted to go back home in the first place. His fondest wish was to sit down with her and try to explain, to tell her how the events of his life had led him to make some stupid decisions, and that he was sorry, genuinely sorry, for any hurt that he had caused to her and her friends. He wanted her forgiveness. And he wanted it badly.

So when Sokka started making odd requests for information about impenetrable prisons, he saw an opportunity. Infiltrating a dangerous Fire Nation prison certainly wasn't a great idea, but if Sokka insisted on going, he wasn't going to let him go alone. After all, he liked the boy, and he didn't want to see him get hurt. Zuko thought that if he could return her brother to her unharmed, maybe she would soften just a little. Maybe he could show her that he was invested in protecting the things that mattered to her. It wouldn't be worthy of forgiveness per se, but it was worth a try.

But when they returned, he hadn't just helped bring her brother back safely. The look on her face when Chief Hakoda walked off the airship was amazing. A mixture of emotions played over her face, first confusion, then relief, and then utter joy. Zuko stood in the background in that moment, smiling and watching the reunion, not wanting to interfere. He was envious for a moment watching the family reunite, seeing how a family was supposed to interact, but the jealousy passed quickly. He had watched the two siblings hug their father, Hakoda's back to him. Katara had looked up over her father's shoulder then, and her watery eyes had met with Zuko's for a brief moment. And in that brief moment, she had smiled. Zuko felt a lightening in his chest at that smile, it was the first one that she had given him in earnest. He knew that it wasn't much, and that things were certain to calm down and go back to the way they were, but it was a start. A tiny crack in that hard shell of hers. It gave him hope.

_Hello, tell me you know, that you've figured me out_

_Something gave it away._

_And it would be such a beautiful moment to see the look on your face,_

_To know that, I know that you know now._

_But baby that's a case of my wishful thinking_

_You know nothing._

_

* * *

_

"But I didn't forgive him. I'll never forgive him…But I am ready to forgive you."

Zuko had just about had it. Sitting around the campfire after a narrow escape from the Western Air Temple, he was surprised to be congratulated by all of the group members. He was really touched that Sokka had even proposed a toast in his honor. And then she had to make yet another snippy comment and spoil his good time. He had even tried to make a joke! It seemed nothing would ever be good enough for her, nothing would ever impress her or convince her that he had changed and was sorry that he had hurt her in the past.

This suspicion was confirmed the moment he found her alone at the edge of the cliff. She was overlooking the ocean, a stiff breeze running through her hair. Silhouetted there, she looked…beautiful. Zuko was not blind. He was a growing young man, and it was hard not to notice what a lovely young woman this waterbender was becoming. He was still shocked every time he walked by when she and the Avatar were training together, seeing her traipsing around in the water in her undergarments. Scandalous! It was no wonder that Aang looked at her that way! Anytime he stumbled in on them like that he always mumbled some incoherent thing and got away as quickly as possible, hoping to hide the color that was rising in his cheeks. Zuko was frankly surprised he hadn't noticed these things about her a long time ago, but admittedly he had other things on his mind when he was chasing them around the world. Now that he had the time to be around her more, it was easy to admire certain qualities that she had.

But now was not the time for those thoughts. As much as he wanted to be friends with this girl, she would not stop antagonizing him. This was just tiresome. He needed to have it out with this girl once and for all. So he approached her, and was promptly yelled at for trying to seek forgiveness. Not that he was expecting anything less, really, but still. He stood on the cliff for a moment after she had passed, thinking about what she had said. Reconquer the Earth Kingdom? Well, he knew where that had come from. That comment wasn't unexpected, even if it was unreasonable. But, bring her mother back? How did he have anything to do with that? That wasn't his fault!

But to her it was somehow, and he needed more information. A quick walk to Sokka's tent almost made him regret his decision to seek out the opinions of others. Here was her brother, sprawled out on his stomach, a rose clenched in his teeth. Zuko hoped that he would be able to block this memory as easily as he had with other painful moments in his life. Initial awkwardness aside, the information gathering mission was a success, and he was able to understand Katara's position a little better. He could see how truly painful losing her mother was, and how it could be easy for her to slip into a comfortable hatred of him based on his association with the Fire Nation, whether he deserved it now or not. The conversation with Sokka made all of this understandable, but that did not make it acceptable. Zuko was determined to show her that he was not the person that she thought he was, and he was going to help her find closure to all of the pain she suffered.

Of course, the Avatar wasn't pleased. Zuko could easily have predicted that. Maybe Zuko was just being paranoid, but it almost seemed like the Avatar was against this mission for other reasons, not just because he thought revenge was wrong. In this case, revenge was needed! Zuko was sure of it. Katara needed to be able to face this man, and confront him with her pain. No one could understand this like Zuko. He too had wanted to seek revenge on the man who took his mother from him, but that was Aang's job. After all, in a round-about way, the Avatar would be getting revenge on the people who destroyed his civilization if he could defeat the Fire Lord and restore balance to the world. He would be allowed to defeat those that took away his people. Why shouldn't Katara be allowed the same peace?

The trip with Katara wasn't exactly what he had hoped it would be. He had hoped that during the long intervals that they were travelling they would be able to talk and get to know each other. He had planned out long speeches in his mind, things he had wanted to say, explanations for previous actions, apologies long in the making. But the atmosphere was never right for any of that. This girl had transformed into someone as single minded as he had been when he was chasing the Avatar and his friends. She was clearly on a mission, and she was tense. Zuko was almost afraid to talk to her too much, for fear of setting her off.

At one point, he woke up on the back of Appa, unsure of how long he had slept. Groggily, he looked up and saw her sitting on Appa's head, slouching and holding the reins. She looked tired. He gently suggested that she get some sleep to prepare for what was to come, but she assured him that she did not need sleep in order to gather her strength. She had plenty. Then, unexpectedly, she launched into her side of the story, about what had happened the day her mother had been killed. The story started out in harsh tones, but softened as she came to the end. Zuko had been dumbfounded. He was not prepared for her to share her painful memories with him. All he could think to say was "you're mother was a brave woman." And Katara had agreed. From that point on, a fragile bond had been formed between them. Tentative, but still there. He knew that, and he knew that he didn't want this to end up like Ba Sing Se all over again: with her giving him her trust and him stepping all over it. He vowed to be careful this time, to not make mistakes. Her single minded attitude didn't cease until the mission had come to completion, but after that conversation, her tones with Zuko were not as rough, her comments not designed to hurt.

Zuko had been impressed with the way she had handled Yan Ra. Zuko knew that he did not possess that kind of resolve; he would have let his emotions take over and he would have had to deal with the consequences in the aftermath. Not to mention that her bending was incredible. He wasn't sure what she had done to that man on the Southern Raiders ship to make him move around like that, but Zuko knew that he didn't want Katara to turn that on him any time soon.

Although it didn't seem like he would have to worry as much anymore. They had arrived back at the campsite, and Katara had headed for the docks. Zuko, sensing her need to be alone for awhile, went off to find Aang to tell him they were back. The Avatar was happy that they were back safely, and even more happy to find out what Katara's actions had been. Zuko told him the story, and all the while he sensed that the Avatar was feeling smug; it leaked onto Aang's features even though he was trying to hold it in. As soon as Zuko had finished, Aang was practically running to find Katara. Zuko had rolled his eyes and followed the monk to the dock.

Katara hadn't thought much of what Aang had to say, Zuko could tell. She seemed to sense that smugness from him as well, and seemed to be irritated by it. Zuko could see that the Avatar still didn't understand the purpose of the mission, and in doing so failed to understand _her_. But just as Zuko thought she was going to pass them both and go back to camp, she looked at him, and forgave him. And hugged him. At first, he didn't know how to react. He was still trying to process her words of forgiveness, words he had waited so long to hear, when she suddenly launched herself at him. Tentatively, he wrapped his arms around her waist, and for just a brief moment, the world seemed to stop. There was no war, no Fire Lord, no Avatar staring stupidly at them. It was just him and Katara, and it felt right. As quickly as it had happened, it was over, and she went strolling back to camp.

A peace had been struck between the two of them with that hug. A peace, and a friendship. Snide remarks and blatant ignoring had been replaced with helpful gestures and quiet talks between the two of them. Where they could find nothing to say to each other before, now the two had conversations that flowed easily. Often, the two would stay up long past when everyone else had gone to sleep, just talking and comparing what their lives had been like growing up in such vastly different places. Katara normally did most of the talking, but Zuko was content to just listen to her. He found her truly fascinating now that she wasn't at his throat all of the time. He found that he missed her when she wasn't around, and started to feel the need to show off (maybe just a little) when she came to watch him practice with the Avatar. Zuko was starting to realize that all of those admirable qualities that she possessed, coupled with that pretty smile and those big blue eyes, were starting to mean more to him than he ever imagined was possible. And if he admitted it to himself, he was starting to like her in ways that extended beyond friendship. In ways that he had never felt or thought about when he was with Mai. It was new, and a little scary, but it felt good.

In all of their talks, they both seemed to avoid the topic of Aang. Zuko was sure that the Avatar had feelings for her, but he wasn't sure how Katara felt about Aang. He thought that they might be together, but the dynamic between her and the Avatar had changed a bit since they had returned from their mission to find the Southern Raiders. Katara was still mothering toward him, but didn't seem to spend as much time with the Avatar, or look at him the same way. Zuko wanted to take this as a good sign, but didn't want to get his hopes up. And he certainly wasn't going to say anything to Katara about the way that _he_ was feeling. He had come too far to destroy the rapport that he had built with Katara. No, he would just have to be happy with the way things were. This was already better than anything he could have hoped for.

_Cause you and I, we go carrying on for hours on end._

_And we get along much better than you and your boyfriend._

_All I really wanna do is love you_

_A kind much closer than friends use_

_But I still can't say it after all we've been through._

_And all I really want from you is to feel me_

_As the feeling inside keeps building_

_And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills _

* * *

"The Avatar? Why he's like a little brother to me! I certainly don't think of him in a romantic way. Besides, how could he ever find out about _this_?"

Of all the things that had happened to Zuko in his almost seventeen years on the planet, this had to be one of the most humiliating. Had to be. The group had decided to go see the _Boy in the Iceberg_, a ridiculous play that was supposed to be about all of them. But, as Zuko had warned, these people were butchering everything they held sacred. Their portrayal of everyone had been laughable until then, and even Zuko had accepted that the actor playing him was not, _could_ not, be doing an accurate job. As they approached the scene entailing the crystal catacombs, Zuko had held his breath. Of all the things he didn't need to see rehashed, it was this. To make matters worse, Katara was sitting right next to him, and he didn't want to have to deal with the uncomfortable proximity when his biggest betrayal was laid out in front of him. He was almost second guessing his decision about insisting on sitting next to her.

He had thought that it would be uncomfortable. He did not anticipate this. The Katara actor was hitting on him! Where did anyone get this information from? He flushed a deep crimson color, as did Katara. He chanced a sideways glance at her, and noticed she did the same. He suddenly became aware of how close they were sitting. Slowly, they edged away from each other, as if not to give anyone the wrong idea. While this was a very amusing portrayal, this was not accurate in the least! He wasn't sure what Katara had told everyone, but he hoped that the account she had given had been detailed so that no one was confused about this absurd version.

The Katara actor went on, talking about how the Avatar was like a brother to her, followed by a romantic looking pose between the two actors on stage. Zuko was mortified. He chanced a glance at Aang, who looked furious and promptly stormed out. Zuko was almost glad that he was gone and hadn't looked at him before he left. He desperately wanted his face to return to normal before anyone noticed his coloring, especially the Avatar.

While he had no such intentions while they were prisoners underneath Ba Sing Se, things had changed since then. Since her forgiveness, Zuko had been spending increasing amounts of time with Katara, and had grown to like her immensely. He would admit to himself now that he wanted to have a closer relationship with her. Since they had come to Ember Island, their nightly talks had moved to the beach. Often, as they walked along the shore, Katara would take his hand, and wouldn't relinquish it until they came into view of the beach house. The first time she had done it, he had gasped a little, and his head had swung in her direction, looking at her in confusion. But she had kept her head down a little, keeping her eyes straight ahead, and kept talking like nothing was out of the ordinary. He thought he detected a little blush on her cheeks, but he couldn't be sure in the moonlight. He didn't question it any further, and just let it happen. It was now a nightly ritual, and he treasured it. It was a time that was just theirs, without any distractions or worries. But it was never anything more than that, and Zuko was content with that.

Watching any behavior like this in the play however felt like he was being exposed. It felt like there was a giant spotlight on him, that all of his new friends were staring at him. It was as though they could see right through him, and he had been found out. He sat perfectly still for the next five minutes, watching the play but not actually seeing it, waiting for the moment to pass, waiting for his breathing to return to normal. When he finally thought it was safe, he carefully looked around at his friends. None of them seemed to be acting any different, or acting like anything out of the ordinary. Zuko was just being paranoid. He sighed a little to himself. It was okay. His secret was still safe.

But then he thought of Aang, and he started panicking again. Aang must think….well what does Aang think? Zuko imagined that he had to be furious! Zuko suddenly realized that the Avatar already had suspicions that this happened; that had to be the reason the kid had given him weird looks when he came upon Zuko and Katara in Ba Sing Se. It made sense to Zuko now, but Aang hadn't been right back then. And now it was not going to look good. Zuko groaned inwardly, trying to figure out how he was going to explain this the next time he saw Aang. After all, Zuko could deny these events to the Avatar, and he would be telling the truth. But what if Aang asked him about his feelings now? He couldn't imagine telling the Avatar the truth, but he was sure that the kid would be smart enough to figure out if he was lying. If he didn't, Toph surely would.

Katara had gone off to talk to Aang during intermission, and Zuko was glad he didn't have to see him. He didn't feel like he could face him just yet. When Katara came back, she seemed distressed, but didn't seem to want to talk about it. They went back into the auditorium to watch the remainder of the play. Zuko noticed that Aang didn't sit next to him as he had before. Zuko felt a little ashamed for upsetting his friend, even though he technically hadn't done anything wrong.

The play finally concluded, ending in a victory for the Fire Lord. Zuko watched in horror as his character literally went down in flames while shouting the word "honor." He knew that this was cheesy, but still couldn't help but feel embarrassed about being portrayed like that. He didn't have time to muse over his character's last words however, because suddenly the auditorium was filled with furious clapping and shouting. He realized slowly that the audience was applauding his death. He sat in disbelief, these people had cheered for him not long ago, when he had been reinstated as their prince, and now they were excited about his demise. From the corner of his eye, he saw Katara had reached her hand out to comfort him, but then glanced behind her and thought better of it. He knew that she didn't want to give Aang any more ideas than he already had, but it still stung a little.

The whole group was mostly silent on the way back to the beach house after the play had ended. Everyone seemed to file listlessly back to their rooms, not wanting to talk about the play, trying to forget about it for different reasons. Zuko lay in bed for awhile, thinking about the play. It was stupid of course, but its effect on him was profound. He thought about the death scene, realizing that when the time came, he really might not make it to see peace among the nations. It was a sacrifice he was willing to make, if he needed to. But he regretted that he might never be able to tell Katara how he felt. No matter how much he wanted to say something to her, it was impossible. There were more important things at stake right now, he didn't need to burden her with this, especially if she didn't feel the same way. He didn't need her to feel awkward around him, and he didn't need the Avatar angry at him. No, he would keep silent. It was tearing him up, but he couldn't risk it. If they were all still safe after the war was over, then maybe he would be honest with her. Until then, he would just have to try to remain as friendly as possible, without giving himself away.

It wasn't easy though. After Aang disappeared, they travelled to the Earth Kingdom to find Jun in order to try and track their lost friend. When they approached her, she looked over at them, and recognized Zuko immediately. Even referred to him by the same nickname that she had used what seemed like years ago. Then, to his utter disbelief, she mentioned something about how she could see that he had worked things out with his girlfriend. Zuko and Katara had both pinked and shouted vehement denials about this. Just like in the play, Zuko had felt exposed. If Toph had sensed anything strange, she didn't mention it, and for that he was thankful. Zuko was glad that Aang wasn't with them at that moment, and hoped that he could go the rest of this trip without people making any more innuendos about himself and Katara. Because they were right. And he figured it was only a matter of time before Katara asked him about it. And if she did, he didn't know what he would say.

_How long can I go on like this, wishing to kiss you, before I rightly explode_

_This double life I lead isn't healthy for me, in fact it makes me nervous_

_If I get caught I could be risking it all_

_But baby there's a life that I'll miss in case I'm wrong_

_

* * *

_

"I think I'm the one who should be thanking you."

The palace was in flames around him. His fight with his sister had been grueling, but he had held his own against her so far. Just like he had told Katara, there was something off about her. He didn't know what it was, but she was not as sharp as normal. Because she hadn't already defeated him swiftly like he thought she might, he made the mistake of taunting her. He thought that maybe she would become flustered and make a final mistake, and he would take her down. He wanted this fight to be over, so he and Katara could both be safe.

But his taunting had backfired. He saw Azula generating the lightning, and even with his Uncles training and previous experience with redirecting it, it seemed like it might be too much to bear. The comet was making it stronger, and it crackled around her like nothing he had ever seen before. Zuko took a calming breath and steadied his stance, preparing for her strike.

He was ready. But in the final moments, he saw a slight shift in Azula's eyes, made bright by the blue electricity that was sparking all around her. A realization dawned on Zuko then: Azula wasn't looking at him, she was looking _behind_ him, and behind him was….Katara.

All of the trepidation that Zuko had felt about his abilities to redirect Azula's lighting evaporated with the sudden knowledge that Katara was in danger, and while he _might_ be able to redirect it, Katara had no hope to do any such thing. Time slowed down. He ran, legs feeling like lead as he tried to reach the bolt before it could get to Katara. Now was the moment of truth. He had to save her. He loved her, he knew it, and if he could only do this one last thing for her, so be it.

Zuko dove for the bolt, arm outstretched, praying to any god that would listen that he make it in time. These thoughts were cut off abruptly by a searing pain that convulsed through his entire body, and he felt his body hit the ground hard. He lay there, twitching, electricity still finding paths to take among his limbs. He tried to catch his breath, but found it difficult. There was a pain in his chest that was unbearable, and he struggled to maintain consciousness. He dimly realized that his fortune hadn't been completely predicted by the play, at least his last word hadn't been 'honor.'

He struggled to sit up but could not. He heard his sister cackle, and managed to turn over. He could now see that his sister had a new target, and that his worst nightmares had been realized. He could see Katara try to run towards him, hand engulfed in water to heal him, but she was halted by Azula's blue flames. In his confused state, he was actually disappointed for a moment that Katara couldn't get to him; he really wanted that healing touch of hers right now. He momentarily regained focus, and mentally slapped himself for putting his own needs above Katara's. He tried to watch the new battle that was now raging, to make sure that Katara was alright, but the pain was overwhelming, and he could not get up and help no matter how much he tried. He finally shut his eyes, convinced that he was going to die here, and hoped that at least Katara could make it out of this alive. He hoped that she would forgive him for being so foolish, and for putting her in danger.

He was not sure how much time had passed, or what had happened, but suddenly there were hands around his waist, trying to turn him over. As he came back into consciousness, he realized that there were no longer loud noises indicating battle. At first he saw a blur of blue, and slowly Katara's face came into focus. It was then that Zuko realized what this meant. She had done what he could not: she defeated his sister. Zuko was awestruck by this young woman in front of him. He had tried to protect her by not getting her involved, and in the end it was she who had saved him. And she had come back for him.

He felt a cooling sensation and saw a bright glow coming from his chest. The pain was suddenly renewed, and he gritted his teeth against it, not wanting to show Katara that she was hurting him. But as quickly as the pain had come it was gone, replaced by relief. There was still pain, but it was manageable. He opened his eyes and glanced at the waterbender who had saved his life. There were tears in her eyes and she looked relieved that he was awake. Now was the time to tell her. He was sure of it. He had loved her for a while now, but never with as much intensity as in this moment. She was disheveled from fighting, but she had never looked so beautiful to him. He smiled weakly and said,

"Thank you Katara."

To which she replied, "I think I'm the one who should be thanking you."

She leaned down, and he thought this was his moment. But he couldn't make himself bridge that small distance between their faces. His mind screamed at him to do something, _anything_, to make his feelings known to her. Instead, he allowed her to help him up, and together they walked to the edge of the courtyard, Katara's hand resting gently on Zuko's back.

_If I should be so bold, I'd ask you to hold my heart in your hands_

_Tell you from the start how I've longed to be your man_

_But I never said a word I guess I've gone and missed my chance again._

_

* * *

_

"All Hail Fire Lord Zuko"

Zuko's coronation had been a success, and he was now in control of the most powerful nation in the world. It was a heavy burden to bear, but he knew that with his friends, he would be able to do great things for his country and for the world. He had hope for the first time in what seemed like years, and he could not help but reflect on how much things had changed.

Team Avatar (which now didn't seem quite so silly now that he was a member) stuck around the palace for a few weeks after the war had ended. He was happy to be around his friends for a little while longer. He knew that eventually they would all go their separate ways, but he wanted to cherish the time that he had with them.

Katara had continued to have healing sessions with Zuko until the pain was mostly a memory and all that was left was a star shaped scar below his heart. In a way, he was glad that the scar had remained, he wanted to keep it as a reminder of that night, and all he had been willing to sacrifice. Zuko had missed their nightly walks, and had suggested to Katara that they resume them while she was at the palace. She eagerly agreed, and often they found themselves sitting at the turtle duck pond. Many nights they would sit in peaceful silence, or chat about superficial things. Neither of them broached the subject of what had happened the night of Sozin's Comet. Zuko desperately wanted to say something, _anything_ that might hint at his deep feelings for her. But the words remained unspoken. He figured perhaps it was better this way, or that maybe she already knew. There was a pain in his heart that had nothing to do with his injury on the day she finally left the Fire Nation.

Uncle Iroh had reopened his tea shop in Ba Sing Se just as he said he would. A few months after the group had gone their separate ways, Zuko received a messenger hawk from his Uncle stating that everyone was planning to get together again. It was a sort of celebration to mark the fact that six months had passed since the Fire Lord had been defeated and peace had come to the world. Zuko was happy to be able to see all of his friends again. He wanted to feel like the Zuko that they were all familiar with, so he left the palace without the royal procession, leaving his royal garments behind. He let his hair down and arrived in the greens and browns of the Earth Kingdom, an outfit he had saved from his days as a tea server.

On his way to Ba Sing Se, he reflected on the last six months. Things in the Fire Nation were going well, although there was a lot of damage, in his own country and of course in others. There was so much to do, but he thought he was handling it well. Rebel factions popped up here and there, but they were easily taken care of. He had still had no luck in finding his mother or obtaining any clue as to her whereabouts, but he was hopeful. Being the leader of a country didn't allow him much time to search for her, but he had people that were investigating for him until things calmed down. He was overloaded with paperwork, and often stayed up well past midnight signing documents and reading proposals. He mused that he might get more done if his mind didn't drift to thinking about a certain pair of blue eyes.

Things had not gone well with Mai. When she had showed up on the day of his coronation, he realized that he hadn't thought about her at all, and might have forgotten that she was even in prison had her uncle not released her. He was happy that she was well, but he simply could not lie to himself and say that he loved her. That statement was reserved for someone else now. He tried to tell Mai this one night, and she had been upset to be sure but didn't seem to be all that surprised. But she didn't stab him, and he took that as a good sign. Zuko realized that maybe she had felt that whatever had been between them was no longer there.

When Zuko arrived at the tea shop, he was greeted warmly by his old friends and his Uncle. During the better part of his travels to Ba Sing Se, he had finally worked up the nerve to tell Katara how he felt. He was going to do it this time. He had had a lot of time to consider it, and he knew for sure now that his feelings were real. They were not just the result of some crush, or some frantic effort to find love during the stress of war; he genuinely loved this young woman. He fingered the proposal necklace in his pocket that he had been working on for the last couple of months. He was just waiting for the right moment to pull her aside and confess all of this to her.

Zuko had taken on his role as tea server once more while the others were lounging around and chatting. Sokka yelled at Zuko to hold still, as he was trying to do a painting to 'capture the moment.' Katara thought this was a nice gesture, until she walked over to her brother's side and was reminded that he was a terrible artist. Everyone gathered around to see this painting, and commotion ensued as everyone had something to say about their poor portrayal. Zuko looked up and saw Katara's figure as she walked out the back door of the tea shop to the large patio overlooking the city. Adrenaline surging, he knew that this was the time, and quietly left the group to follow her.

_All I really want to do is love you_

_A kind much closer than friends use_

_But I still can't say it after all we've been through._

_And all I really want from you is to feel me_

_As the feeling inside keeps building_

_And I will find a way to you if it kills me, if it kills me, if it kills me._

Zuko did not see that Aang had exited moments before Katara had.

Zuko stepped out onto the patio, smiling, her name on the tip of his tongue. His words quickly shoved themselves back down his throat when he looked toward the railing. There was Katara, arms around the Avatar, kissing him. They were surrounded by the backdrop of the magnificent city at sunset, Katara looking more beautiful than ever in her Earth Kingdom clothes and a flower in her hair.

Zuko felt sick. He couldn't move from his spot in the doorway, couldn't tear his eyes away from the scene in front of him. It was like some sort of bad dream. This was not the way things were supposed to work out. Everything had been going so well for him, it only seemed natural that the thing he wished most for would fall into place like everything else. He was speechless, he felt like all of the wind had been knocked out of his chest. The night he had been struck with lightning, he was sure he was going to die, the pain was unbelievable, but he accepted it. Now, the pain was even worse, and he only wished he could die, because this was beyond anything he had imagined.

He couldn't have known that Katara had missed him. He couldn't have known that Katara had been thinking about him in the same ways, and had wanted to contact him ever since she had left the palace. He couldn't have known that she was simply granting Aang something that she knew the Avatar had always wanted, before bidding him goodbye. She had fulfilled her promise to Aang to help with some of the post-war reconstruction, and now she was planning on making a trip to the Fire Nation.

Zuko couldn't have known any of that. When he finally snapped himself out of his trance, he silently turned from the doorway. He crept by the rest of his friends, who were still laughing and drinking tea, and headed toward the door. On his way out, he pulled the necklace out of his pocket and flung it into the trash. He walked down the steps of the tea shop, and saddled up his ostrich horse. Only when he had gotten a few miles away from the shop did he allow the tears that had been building up to fall.

_I think it might kill me._

_

* * *

_

A/N - that's the first chapter of If It Kills Me! It was a contest entry for Zutara Eternity, and it was a songfic. Hence, I added in lyrics from a Jason Mraz song, "If It Kills Me." I just couldn't leave it alone though, so this is turning into a full blown story. The rest of the chapters advance the plot and don't follow this format, so give them a try! Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 1

A/N: So, here's the second part to what was supposed to be just a oneshot. It keeps growing in my mind, and I can't help myself. Things will be a bit different, there won't be the same structure as the last chapter, and we get to see other character's POV's. Also, dialogue! Yea! Anyway, hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar.

* * *

The rest of the group may have missed Zuko's abrupt departure from the tea shop, but it did not escape the notice of Iroh. Curious, he slowly crept toward the door, careful not to alert the attention of the others. Peering around the doorway of the front entrance, he watched his nephew angrily preparing his ostrich horse for a journey. After a few minor adjustments, Zuko was gone, riding hard, the dust that the animal kicked up the only thing remaining where he once stood.

Iroh stepped out of the doorway and onto the front patio, brow furrowed, confused and distressed about his Nephew's sudden exit. Zuko was supposed to stay in Ba Sing Se for the remainder of the week, a well needed rest from his duties as Fire Lord. At the end of that time, Iroh was to travel back to the Fire Nation with him, so that he could attend to some business matters. Iroh knew that it wasn't unlike his nephew to make rash, sometimes incomprehensible decisions, but he thought that those days were mostly behind them. Zuko had matured immensely in the last year, and the last six months had certainly saddled him with a great amount of responsibility. Iroh was proud of all that Zuko had accomplished, but knew that he was still very young, and the boy needed a break.

Which made it all the more confusing that Zuko had up and left like that. Iroh hadn't seen him strapping anything to his ostrich horse, which meant he had left most of his belongings here. And he seemed to be headed in the general direction of the nearest port where his airship was docked. Iroh shook his head, bewildered. He turned to go back to the group inside the shop, to ask them if they knew anything about this, when a gleam of light caught his eye.

A trash can had been placed by the front entrance of the shop for the convenience of customers. There, sitting on top of used napkins and other refuse, was an exquisite piece of jewelry. Iroh gingerly pulled it out of the trash to examine it, thinking some poor customer must be missing this by now.

It was a necklace featuring a single flat, round stone made of black onyx. The back and sides of the stone had been dipped in gold, to make the edges shine. A symbol was carved into the front, and the indentations created from the carving were inlayed with gold, creating a striking contrast. The black and gold stone was then attached to an understated, yet clearly high-end piece of crimson silk. It was quite a lovely piece of craftsmanship; Iroh couldn't understand why anyone would throw such a thing away.

But then something in his brain clicked, and he realized that he knew this carving. It was identical to the symbol that hung around Katara's neck, only this was done in the colors of the Fire Nation. Now why, Iroh mused, would anyone want to make a Fire Nation necklace with a Water Tribe symbol on it....?

_Oh._

_Oh no._

Suddenly it all became clear. It was obvious now that his nephew was not coming back to the shop, and that something very unfortunate had happened that managed to escape the retired general's watchful eye. Iroh had half a mind to try and follow Zuko, and was about to consider this option in more depth, when there was a tap at his shoulder.

Iroh whirled around, quickly stuffing the necklace up his long left sleeve. Standing there, looking oblivious, was the Master waterbender herself.

"General Iroh—?" she started, with a genuine smile on her face.

"Please, dear, call me Uncle."

She smiled again, a little embarrassed at the informality. "Uncle. Have you seen Zuko? There was something I wanted to ask him."

Iroh didn't know what to say to this. How could she not know? Surely that was why his nephew stormed out? Or maybe something else had occurred. He could not detect any strange behavior from her, so she must not know. He would have to investigate this further. In the meantime, he would have to think fast. He wasn't known as a revered former military strategist for nothing.

"I have seen him, my dear. He had to leave abruptly, trouble back at the palace. His presence was requested immediately. Such are the consequences of ruling a nation, I'm afraid."

Katara quirked an eyebrow at this, at little annoyed by this piece of information. "What, he couldn't manage to even say goodbye to me – I mean all of us? We haven't seen him in ages! Oh no, it's nothing serious I hope?" Her anger quickly dissolved into worry.

Iroh put a hand on her shoulder and chuckled. "No, no. But you know how the aristocracy and bureaucrats can be. Zuko has to do his best to cater to them at the moment. They provide a large base of support, and he needs their loyalty. He is managing it the best he can."

Katara seemed to consider this, and found that she couldn't find any fault in this logic. She smiled back up at the general. "Well Uncle, since the mighty Fire Lord is too busy, perhaps I can talk to you. You see, I had heard that you were going to travel back with Zuko to the Fire Nation at the end of this week. Do you still plan to do that, now that he seems to have left without you?"

"Why yes, I do. I have business matters to attend to. Some of my best teas come from a local market near the palace, and I find it cheaper to travel there myself from time to time. It also gives me an excuse to pester my nephew. Why do you ask?"

Katara looked down and shuffled her feet a little. "Well, I was going to ask Zuko if there was anything that I could do for him in palace, or in the Fire Nation. I've finished my reconstruction plans with Aang. I was hoping Zuko would have a need for me, and that I could travel back with the two of you." Katara flushed a little bit, still feeling a little uncomfortable.

"Oh, I'm sure that Zuko will always have a need for you," Iroh grinned mischievously, capitalizing on her choice of words, "I mean, in the Fire Nation of course! You are a young woman of many talents, I'm sure that he could use your help."

Katara flushed a deeper color at his double entendre, and laughed weakly. "Well, I guess we'll see about that. So, may I have the pleasure of travelling with you in a week's time? Or do you think I should send a messenger hawk to Zuko first, asking if he needs my help?"

Iroh almost choked. "Oh no! I mean, of course you are welcome to travel with me, my dear. It has been awhile since I have had such a lovely travel companion. But there is no need to tell Zuko you are coming. He leads a very dull life in the palace I'm afraid, a surprise would do him some good." With his hand back on her shoulder, he began to lead her back to the rest of the group.

"Thank you Uncle Iroh! But, may I ask you something?"

"Anything, Master Katara."

"Why were you digging around in the trash?"

It was Iroh's turn to flush. He stopped in his tracks, and said, "Oh, I…thought I lost my lotus tile again! But it turns out that it was in my sleeve the whole time! See?" He pulled the tile out of his other sleeve, brandishing a wide grin, with the strange feeling that he had done something eerily similar to this before.

* * *

Back on the safety of the airship, Zuko sighed to himself, grateful for two things.

First, he was thankful that he had chosen the mode of transportation that he did. The ostrich horse had provided a quick and easy getaway. If he had taken the royal entourage, as his advisors had pleaded with him to do, it would have been disastrous. Well, more disastrous, in any event.

Second, (and he couldn't believe he was thinking this), he was _glad_ that he had found out about Katara's relationship with Aang that way. Not that it didn't hurt, the pain was still very much alive, causing a prickling behind his eyes and a feeling of constriction in his chest. But this was far preferable to the alternative. To think what would have happened if he had pulled her aside….

The humiliation would have been excruciating! If he had been rejected like that, he wasn't sure that he would have ever been able to look her in the eyes again. He wasn't sure he would have been able to occupy the same_ room_ with her again. Ever. No, this was better. At least this way, he could go on pretending like nothing happened, he could just make up some excuse that the Fire Nation needed him immediately, and everyone would be none the wiser.

Yes, at least this way, he still had her friendship. He had been happy all those times on the Ember Island beach, walking hand in hand with her, or sitting with her by his mother's turtle duck pond, shoulders casually leaning against each other while they chatted. None of that would have to go away, if he didn't want it to. Unless she would be too busy with the Avatar to come and visit. Or unless the Avatar didn't like the way they interacted. Or unless…

Nonsense. Katara was a strong willed woman, and if she wanted to see him, she would, and she would act however she pleased, Avatar or no Avatar. Katara was his friend, and if friendship was all she wanted, well then that was fine. She never needed to know any of the things he was going to tell her, things he was now glad that he had kept to himself.

Zuko stood at the window of the airship, looking down at the ocean. Why, in this moment, did he have to be surrounded by the Agni-forsaken ocean? He sighed again. He reflected on his reaction after he had left the tea shop. He had stopped along the side of an empty road, dismounted from his ostrich horse, and slumped under a tree, both hands cradling his head. At the time, he had felt overwhelmingly disappointed, and indescribably hurt. His tears had been the result of this feeling, plus one of frustration. He was tired of being disappointed, by others, in others, and in himself. Frustration had quickly turned to anger, a feeling Zuko slid easily into due to large amounts of practice. His tears were quickly forgotten as he stood up and began pacing back and forth. He had spent a few moments shouting curses to no one in particular, and then threw a fiery punch at the tree that had recently given him comfort. It did not ignite; instead it only left a black scorch mark on the trunk. He thought automatically that he was glad it hadn't, since Katara wasn't here to put out the fire, scolding him all the while. With this realization, he kicked at the ground pointlessly, hoping that eventually his thoughts would stop leading directly to her.

He had gotten back on his ostrich horse, and began to ride again. The anger had slowly dissipated, only to be replaced with a general numbness. During his ride, he kept repeating phrases over and over to himself, like mantras, like prayers. _Just friends? Ok. With the Avatar? Well, ok. NOT with me? Ok, I guess…._

It wasn't working. He was looking forward to arriving back at the palace, where he could bury himself in backlogged paperwork. He would even jump at the opportunity to sit in meetings with his boring advisors. He just wanted anything to distract him from how stupid and vulnerable he felt inside.

His thoughts were interrupted by a slight knock at his door.

"Your Highness? We are preparing to arrive in the capitol in approximately two hours time."

Finally. All Zuko wanted was to get back to the palace and forget that this had ever happened.

* * *

The remainder of the week at the tea shop had passed quickly. Katara slowly bid her friends and family goodbye as they left at different intervals throughout the week, all needing to get back to their lives, but happy for the opportunity to reunite. Sokka and Suki were headed to the South Pole for a quick visit before returning to Kyoshi Island where they currently resided. Toph, not wanting to return home just yet ("or ever", as she had stated with a grin), had decided that she would accompany Aang on his visit to the North Pole to help settle some trade agreements between the Northern Water Tribe and the Earth Kingdom.

At the end of the week, it was just Katara and Iroh, and it felt empty without the others, quiet without the laughter that could previously be heard coming from the main room. Katara felt a pang of loneliness, already missing her friends. But then she thought about how she was going to the Fire Nation to see Zuko, and she immediately brightened.

The excitement grew as she helped Iroh close up the shop to prepare for the time he would be gone. Before she knew it, she found herself on the deck of a Fire Nation trade vessel, enjoying the ocean air. They would be arriving at the capitol within two weeks time, and she was a whirlwind of emotion. She had not been back to the Fire Nation since the war had ended, and was anxious to see how it had changed. She knew, of course, that there would still be considerable damage, and hoped that she could be of some help. She was concerned, as well, as she knew that although the war was over, there was still some unkind sentiment toward non-nationals. Katara wanted to help bridge the gap between the nations that still lingered by offering her services to Zuko's people.

Katara stood at the railing, and thought about her recent travels with Aang. She was glad that she could help him, and was pleased to be able to travel with some sense of leisure now that they weren't constantly being pursued. She felt a bit guilty for not staying on with Aang longer, as there was still so much to do, but Katara was beginning to grow weary of being rootless, of not staying in one place for more than a few days at the most. She wanted some stability, and a bed that she could call her own, at least for awhile. When Toph had offered to tag along with Aang on his next series of travels, Katara had been glad, and her guilt had been considerably lessened. She secretly hoped that Toph would help him to get over the feelings that he had harbored for Katara for so long.

It's not that Katara wasn't flattered by his feelings, or that she didn't love Aang. She just didn't love him the way that he wanted or needed. She had thought, long ago, that her feelings for him might go that direction, and had even tried to force herself to feel something. But doing so made her uncomfortable, as though she were wearing an ill fitting dress that constricted her movements. It just didn't feel natural. What _was_ natural was her need to protect him, to take care of him, just as any other member of the family. But that was all she could ever feel for him, if she were honest with herself. It had turned out that the stupid play they had seen had been accurate about some things after all. She just hadn't been able to admit that to herself at the time.

What she had finally admitted to herself were her feelings for Zuko. She couldn't quite put a name to the feelings, but she knew that when she left the palace almost six months ago, she regretted it. Again, not because she didn't want to help Aang, but because she missed her daily routines at the palace, her nightly walks with Zuko. Katara was very fond of Zuko, yes, maybe that was the word. They had come a long way together, and had a rather sordid history, but that was all in the past. He had worked hard to redeem himself in her eyes, and she respected him for that. He could have just as easily trained the Avatar and avoided her until the end of the war, but he was persistent in his efforts to make her trust him again. And she was glad that he had.

Being angry with him had been a burden. It was almost a relief to forgive Zuko, she found she could finally relax once she had. Not that he didn't deserve her anger; he had certainly earned her wrath in many ways. However, even she could tell that she was getting out of control. She had just felt so stressed, with the pressure of the war, Aang's feelings, and taking care of everyone, all on top of traumatizing memories that kept coming back from her past. When Zuko joined the group, she was already angry with him from past hurts, and it was so easy to just release all of the pent up frustration that she had felt onto him. She regretted being so harsh with him now, although she knew that it was all water under the bridge, so to speak.

But when they had finally become friends, they were good friends. They shared so much in the short time that they had been together. She was shocked with herself the first time that she had reached out to hold his hand. She felt certain that he would yank his own hand away, and that she would be humiliated. But Zuko hadn't reacted negatively, and she liked the way it felt. What was at first a gut reaction became a habit, something she took for granted but noticed if it were absent.

Katara knew that she was privileged in that she got to see a side of Zuko that most people were not privy to. His voice softened, as did his expressions. He actually smiled for her, and occasionally laughed. He was still socially awkward, but that was endearing. She had been amused by the fact that this prince, the one who had intimidated her for so long when he was chasing them, and who was brought up in a world of manners and protocol and trained to command people, would trip and fumble over words when around her.

She had been growing to like him more and more as time had passed before the war. On the night of Sozin's comet, she had been shocked and horrified when he risked his life to save her. The thought of losing him had been unbearable, and had given her the strength and focus to defeat his lunatic sister. She knew then that what she felt for him was not within the boundaries of normal friendship. She had wanted to express this to him, but she couldn't. After all, he had a girlfriend that was waiting for him in prison somewhere. Katara knew that no matter what she felt, she couldn't come in between them, it wasn't right.

As much as she hadn't wanted to leave the palace, (and Zuko), it had been strange when Mai had come back. Katara felt like an intruder at times, watching the two of them interact. Although, she noticed that Zuko often shied away from Mai, or made excuses to be away from her. She thought at the time that this was strange, but then again, they were an odd sort of people, perhaps that was just their way. When she had heard on her travels that Zuko and Mai were no longer together, suddenly their interaction made more sense. Zuko had never really talked about her with Katara, so she wasn't sure how he had felt about Mai before, but it was clear to her now that the behavior she had witnessed between the two of them had not just been the result of unusual personalities. She had been witnessing the end of whatever had been between the two of them.

After the news, her want to go back to the Fire Nation had intensified. She missed his smiles, his hands in hers, the warmth of him next to her.

Ok, maybe "fond" wasn't the right word.

But whatever it was, it felt good, and she was happy to be going back. She stood at the railing, watching the sun dip down below the horizon, and decided to return to her cabin for the evening. She was one day closer to being back at that pond, and back with Zuko.

* * *

From the other side of the deck, Iroh watched the young Water Tribe woman as she stared dreamily off into the distance. Iroh was old, and therefore wise, and he knew that look. He had seen it on countless teenagers before. Iroh knew that whoever she was thinking about, he was a lucky boy. And he had a feeling he knew _who_ she was thinking about behind those unfocused eyes and that slight smile. But, he wanted to play it safe, and investigate this situation a little more before he proceeded. It was best to talk to Zuko first before he made any moves or insinuations. Smiling to himself and stroking his beard, he too decided to retire for the evening.

* * *

The days on the ship passed far too slowly for Katara. She tried to keep busy, falling into a routine of having tea with Iroh in the mornings and playing Pai Sho with him in the evenings. She was a beginner, and he almost always beat her, but she found that she was getting better at preparing strategies and occasionally could outmaneuver him. It was a good way to pass the time, regardless.

On the day of their arrival in the Fire Nation, Katara felt like she might jump out of her skin. For all of her pining, she was nervous. She was certain now that it was a mistake not to warn Zuko that she was coming. He was very busy, what if he was upset with her for barging in and expecting him to accommodate her? More than anything, however, she was nervous about seeing him. She planned on just acting normally around him, to gage his reactions to her. She didn't want to reveal anything about these feelings she was having, whatever they were, until she could make sure that nothing had changed between them. After all, she hadn't gotten to spend any time with just him at the tea shop, and then he had left abruptly without even saying goodbye to her. No, she needed to be sure that they could at least fall back into the old routines before she said anything.

They arrived at the palace, and Katara had been a little embarrassed about riding in the royal procession that Zuko had sent to pick up his uncle. It was clear that Zuko had only known about Iroh's arrival, as she had to cram herself into the palanquin with Iroh, and some of the soldiers had to be demoted to package handlers in order to accommodate her possessions. She hadn't had much when she arrived in Ba Sing Se, but in their last day there, Iroh had insisted that they go shopping. She had tried to tell Iroh that this wasn't necessary, but he insisted. _After all_, he had said, _you will be seen by members of the aristocracy and high court, you must look the part. They are vipers, the lot of them, so you must present yourself accordingly as to not arouse their vicious natures. _She had finally agreed, not wanting to embarrass herself or Zuko by appearing in her simple attire. She had been exhausted by the end of the day, having tried on enough dresses to make her head spin. The one time that Iroh had caught her looking at the price of the clothes, he had gently rapped her on the hand, making her drop the tag. He mock scolded her, telling her that it was not for her to worry about the price of things. She swore she heard him mumble something under his breath about "Zuko" and "worth it," but she couldn't be sure.

Iroh led Katara to the room that she would be staying in, the same one that she had occupied on her last visit. She stood outside of the room and chatted briefly with Iroh while the servants brought in trunk after trunk of clothing. She felt silly about having them do this for her, and at the sheer amount of items that were being brought in. She had tried to help, but was scolded again by Iroh, who smiled and told her to relax and let them do their jobs.

After the servants had finished, Iroh told her to get settled in. He had apologized for the fact that Zuko was unable to greet them, but that they had arrived during a very important meeting that Zuko couldn't miss. Iroh told her to wait here and get unpacked, and that he would come to call on her when dinner was served.

Katara went into her room, glad to be off the ship and finally here. She was still a bundle of nerves, however, and was feeling restless. Determined to work off some energy, and distract herself from her feelings, she gladly undertook the daunting task of unpacking all of the trunks that had been left in her room.

* * *

Zuko was bored. Really bored. He was sitting on the throne in what was once the war room, surrounded by his economic advisors. He had since had the room redecorated, so that some of the harshness was missing. He had not liked the wall of flames that his father and grandfather had used to sit behind (what was that for anyway? Who could see what was going on behind all of that?) and instead had replaced this with large ornate vases that were lit with flames on either side of him. The only downside to this change was that now his advisors could actually see _him_, and he fought to stifle his yawns as one of his men droned on about trade agreements.

Zuko was relieved when the meeting was finally over, and he could take a break before the next meeting began. He waited until everyone had left the room before sighing loudly and rubbing his temples. Being Fire Lord was certainly a lot…different than he had expected. Not that he wasn't satisfied with it, it was what he was bred to do. But after all of the excitement and freedom of the last few years, this highly structured life and stifling schedule were a bit hard to get used to. Getting up off the throne, he began walking toward the door to get some fresh air, when suddenly a familiar face appeared in the doorway.

"Uncle! You've arrived! I thought someone was supposed to notify me?" Zuko said, approaching his uncle to embrace him warmly, a little disgruntled that he hadn't been informed.

"Yes, Lord Zuko, but I told the servants that I would be happy to wait outside for you. I did not want to interrupt you or your advisors."

"I wish you would have, Uncle," Zuko said, pulling back from his Uncle and smiling.

Iroh smiled back, but cautiously. "Zuko, I need to talk to you, preferably in private. Do you have the time to have some tea with an old man?"

"Of course, Uncle. I have an hour before the next meeting starts, and I can have someone bring some tea to my office. Come, follow me. Although I'm sure you know the way." Zuko smiled and the two of them walked through the halls of the palace.

They arrived at Zuko's private office and Iroh shut the door quietly behind him. Zuko offered Iroh a seat, and then sat down behind his desk. Zuko pulled the Fire Lord emblem out of his hair and set it gently atop a pile of paperwork. He reached up and released the top knot to let his hair, which had gotten longer since the end of the war, hang down about his ears. No matter how many people bowed to him and called him all sorts of pompous titles, he always felt a little silly in that role around Iroh. He shook his hands through his hair a few times to get it to lay right, and then looked up expectantly at his uncle.

"So what is so secretive that you wanted to talk to me in private Uncle? Is everything alright?" Zuko asked with a concerned look on his face.

"Well, nephew, I was going to ask you that," Iroh said, as he produced a necklace out of his sleeve. He held it in the air, and looked at Zuko, waiting for a reaction.

Zuko was stunned. This was not even remotely close to anything he thought he would be discussing with his Uncle. He stared at the piece of jewelry and unconsciously sat back a bit, as though it was a dangerous thing that might harm him.

"Uncle," Zuko started, all the feelings that he had been trying to forget flooding back to him. "Where…where did you get that?"

"I found this lovely necklace in the garbage at my tea shop. I couldn't just leave it lying there, it was far too lovely. It's obvious that this was carefully crafted. A lot of time went into this exquisite piece. I knew that whoever dropped it would most certainly want it back. Do you know who this might belong to, Lord Zuko?" Iroh looked at Zuko pointedly.

Zuko looked away, frustrated and embarrassed. He thought he had made a clean getaway, but he should have known that his uncle would notice that something was amiss. Nothing ever seemed to get by the old man.

Zuko ran a hand through his hair and slumped his shoulders, looking defeated. He looked out the window and mumbled, "I wasn't actually going to give it to her…"

"What was that Nephew?" Iroh inquired.

Zuko ignored this question, and said instead, "I supposed you want to know why I left."

"You did leave rather quickly; I was worried that something was wrong. Please, enlighten me."

Zuko did not know where to begin. He was not excited about reliving this again, but it didn't look like his Uncle was just going to let this go. He knew he had no choice but to confess. "I don't know what I was thinking. I – I had been getting closer to Katara when we were travelling together, you know that. But I didn't want to say anything to her at the time, we both had so much on our minds with the war. After it was over, and after she had left the palace, I started thinking that I had made a mistake letting her leave like that. I thought that maybe I would talk to her in Ba Sing Se. But just as I was going to do so, I saw her kissing the Avatar on the patio! I didn't know what to do, so I just left. I wasn't going to give it to her anyway though."

"Why not Nephew? It really is beautifully done."

Zuko rolled his eyes. "I couldn't just propose to her Uncle!" he said, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. "I didn't even know if she felt the same way. And clearly she doesn't. I just had it with me for courage, to remind me that I didn't want to go home without telling her how important she is to me. But I couldn't even do that." Zuko leaned back in his chair, feeling that constriction in his chest once more. He started fiddling with things on his desk in order to distract himself.

Iroh studied his nephew, remaining silent for a few moments. He had spoken offhandedly to Katara about Aang while they were travelling, and she had made no indication that she was involved with the boy, she spoke of him as a friend and as a brother. She did, however, seem to get that funny look in her eye whenever the old General mentioned Zuko. Iroh was shocked to hear that she had kissed the Avatar, but he had a feeling that it was not as it seemed. He then looked Zuko straight in the eyes, and said seriously, "Zuko, Katara is not in a romantic relationship with the Avatar."

Zuko stopped rearranging the papers on his desk. He was sure that he had misheard this. He sat very still for a moment, feeling his heart lift a little, feeling a little bit of hope. But it didn't last. He became irritated, saying "How can you say that Uncle? Didn't you hear what I said? She was _kissing_ the Avatar on the patio! How do you explain that? There wasn't any cactus juice in the tea you were serving, so I know I didn't imagine it!" He slammed down a stack of papers he had been holding.

"Zuko, listen to me. I know what you saw, but I don't think that it meant what you thought it did."

Zuko crossed his arms, and turned his head to the side, as though he were pouting. "I don't know how you could possibly know that Uncle. Look, can we just forget about this? I really don't want to talk about it anymore." He started gathering his hair back up into a top knot, and slid his crown into place. "I'm sorry Uncle, if you'll excuse me, I have another meeting to attend to. Will I see you at dinner?"

Iroh agreed and stood, following Zuko out of the office, but not until he had deposited the necklace on the Fire Lord's desk. Zuko glanced briefly at his Uncle before heading down an opposite hall toward a room that would by now be filled with impatient advisors.

Zuko settled into his place into the meeting, and tried to listen to his counsel discuss matters of education within the Fire Nation, but he couldn't concentrate. How could his Uncle even think those things? He hadn't been there, he hadn't seen it. There was no evidence that Katara was not in a relationship with the Avatar. But somehow, his mind and his heart couldn't help but hope.

The meeting ended, and there was still some time before he would be called to have dinner with his Uncle. Zuko needed a break. His body felt heavy, and he just wanted to be alone somewhere where he could relax for a bit. Even though it often brought up memories of Katara, he found that there was no other place in the palace that brought him peace like his mother's turtle duck pond. He headed there, anticipating the relief of sitting next to the water and closing his eyes for a bit.

But as he approached, he saw a figure already occupying his favorite place by the pond. Aggravated that someone was going to spoil his tranquility, he was about to call out angrily when the figure turned toward him. He stopped in a jerky motion, almost tripping over his long robes, and stared. His brain seemed to explode with a medley of emotion, and he gaped at what he saw. Pulling himself together, he said in a voice not much louder than a whisper:

"Katara?"

* * *

A/N II: I swear to you, I didn't want to end it there, but if I didn't it would have been prohibitively long. So clearly, there will have to be one more chapter at least. I know that the Iroh taking Katara shopping is overdone, but I think Iroh is so charming, I just had to. Also, did I mention I'm a _psychology_ student? That could be the reason for the lenghty jaunts into character's feelings and such. Hopefully this adds to the story and isn't distracting, I just can't help trying to get into their heads! Please R&R! I love to hear what people think, good or bad.


	3. Chapter 2

A/N: So here it is, chapter three of this story that was only supposed to be a one-shot for the Zutara Eternity contest on dA. Tada! Sorry that it took so long, but school was consuming my life during all my waking hours for the last 2 weeks. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar. Too bad for me. :(

* * *

It had taken Katara less time to put all of her belongings away than she had thought it would.

The dresses that Iroh had bought for her were now hanging in her closet, surprisingly wrinkle-free for the most part after their two week journey from Ba Sing Se. She was amazed to find that there was still room to spare in the ample closet; she couldn't imagine how anyone would have the need for that much clothing space. Just how many outfits did one person really need? After all of the time she had spent travelling, she was used to having everything that she needed shoved into a small satchel. The opulence seemed almost ridiculous after living that way for so long.

After her clothes were put away, she unpacked and arranged everything else that she had brought with her. Sitting down on the bed, she felt a sense of satisfaction now that everything was in its place, both new and old items alike. She looked out the window, and by the position of the sun, it was clear that not much time had passed since Iroh had left. She sighed, trying to think of what else she could do until dinner was served.

She went back to the closet and arranged the dresses by color in order to kill some time. Iroh had insisted on expanding her wardrobe beyond the blue Water Tribe colors that she was partial to. Now she had garments that were resplendent with dark crimson silk, deep emerald velvet, and of course, ocean blue satin. She noticed absently that there were no colors representative of the Air Nomads, but wasn't really disappointed by this. She had never thought those colors would be attractive on her anyway.

Another glance out the window told her that she still had plenty of time to spare. Katara decided that she had better change into something that would be appropriate to wear to dinner with the Fire Lord. She laughed to herself at this thought. Less than a year ago, the idea of having dinner with the Fire Lord would have been absurd. She was still a little awestruck when she considered how much things had changed. Ozai, the man who had terrified and traumatized them all, was now powerless and imprisoned. In his place stood Zuko, her awkward and endearing friend Zuko, who was trying desperately to undo all of the evil that his father had created. Katara knew that he must be overwhelmed by it at times, but she was proud of him and the progress he had made so far.

Katara picked out something to wear and proceeded to get ready. She styled her hair, and deliberated on some accessories for awhile (Iroh really had gone overboard). With a last glance in the mirror and a few minor adjustments, she determined that she would be acceptable for the royal table.

However, time seemed to crawl, and she still had about an hour until dinner. She tried lying down on her bed to take a short nap, but quickly dismissed this idea, not wanting to wrinkle her dress or mess her hair. As luxurious as the room was, there really wasn't anything to do in it but sleep and dress, and restlessness was creeping up on her again.

Peeking out the door to her room, she saw a guard posted outside of her doorway. Katara was a little surprised by the guard's presence, after all, she was perfectly capable of defending herself. She decided that it was probably just protocol and chose not to take offense. She stepped out of her room and addressed the guard, asking him to tell Iroh that she had gone for a walk if he came looking for her, but that she would return soon.

At first, she had no real destination in mind. She walked the halls of the palace aimlessly, just enjoying the late afternoon sunlight and mild ocean breeze that found its way inland. The weather was mild that day for the Fire Nation, and she was glad for this. On her previous visit, and during their travels before the end of the war, it had been unbearably hot on some days, causing her to feel sticky and uncomfortable. After growing up on the icy tundra, it was still hard for her not to feel drained in exceptionally warm weather.

As she rounded a corner, she caught sight of the path that led to the turtle duck pond. Excited to see how her little friends had been, she followed the stone walk that would lead her to them.

She sat down on the grass near the edge of the pond, trailing a finger in the water. It felt cool and refreshing to the touch. The animal inhabitants of the pond perked up at the disturbance in the water, and began to swim toward her. Katara smiled as she saw the turtle ducks swim in her direction, quacking loudly. She felt slightly guilty because she had not thought to bring anything to feed them with, but she had not intended on ending up here. She interacted with them briefly, petting the ones that would allow it, but soon they realized that she did not have anything to offer them and they began to drift off to other parts of the pond.

She moved away from the water to sit on the bench nearby. She figured that she shouldn't get her dress dirty before dinner. She leaned back, hands supporting her on either side, and closed her eyes. She took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of the fragrant blooming bushes that were scattered around the pond. She felt herself relax a bit, enjoying the little bit of nature that the palace had to offer.

It was relaxing, but it wasn't perfect. It felt a bit strange to Katara that she was sitting here alone, without Zuko. This was their place. She missed him then, wishing he were here right now. At the same time, however, she was worried that what they once had was gone. Perhaps the Fire Lord would be too busy to have nightly walks with her now. Maybe he wouldn't want to anymore.

She was pulled out of these thoughts by the sound of footsteps coming down the stone path. She was suddenly worried that her walk had taken too long, and that she was going to be late for dinner. She turned, expecting to see Iroh coming to retrieve her.

But it wasn't Iroh at all.

Instead, standing about ten feet away, gaping, was His Royal Majesty, Fire Lord Zuko himself.

* * *

Zuko could not believe his eyes. He had composed himself a little, but could still not think of what to do besides stand there after he uttered her name.

The fact that she looked amazing did not help his thought processes one bit.

He had never seen her dressed like this. The most elegantly he had ever seen her dress was in that Earth Kingdom robe that she had been wearing at Uncle's tea shop just a few weeks ago. Ordinarily she was never seen in anything but the comfortable, casual blues of her nation. Now, here she was in a form fitting sleeveless gown done in the vibrant reds of the Fire Nation, hair exquisitely styled and accented by some tiny things that made her practically sparkle. Zuko was dumbstruck. Why was she dressed this way? What was she doing here?

Wait. Really, what _was _she doing here?

Zuko shook his head a bit to clear his thoughts, and was about to ask this very question, when she stood up and came toward him.

* * *

The excitement that Katara had felt at finally being able to see Zuko subsided when she saw the look on his face. He wasn't smiling, he wasn't moving. He was just staring at her as though she had grown a second head. She suddenly felt stupid. Stupid for being here, stupid for wearing this dress, stupid for not telling him that she was coming. She knew it was a mistake not sending that messenger hawk in advance! What was she thinking!

A bit disheartened, but still happy to see him, she got off of the bench and started walking toward him. She stopped a few feet away, and looked up at him, studying him. She had not had much chance to be with him at the tea shop before his abrupt departure. He had grown taller in the last six months since the end of the war, and it seemed that his hair had gotten longer. She was still unaccustomed to seeing him in the royal regalia, even after the time she had spent at the palace after the war. Whenever she pictured Zuko in her mind, she always imagined the young man who had traveled with them before the comet came, shaggy hair and simple clothes. While she knew that it was still the same Zuko underneath the crown and pomp, his appearance was still striking. She flushed a little and smiled at him.

"Hey, Zuko. Um, surprise?" He continued to stare at her blankly. She looked away, embarrassed. Surprise? That was all she could come up with? Stupid!

Suddenly, Zuko seemed to come to life. His eyes refocused and he grabbed her by the shoulders, inundating her with questions. "Katara! What are you doing here? How long have you been here? Why wasn't I notified? Has something happened? Where did you get those clothes?"

Katara stared at him for a moment, blinking a few times, before bursting into laughter. She gently removed his hands from her shoulders, while he continued to look confused. "Calm down Zuko. Nothing is wrong. I arrived this afternoon with your Uncle Iroh. He didn't tell you I was here?"

Zuko rolled his eyes, but a hint of a smile could be seen on his lips. "Obviously not. He came to my office after one of my meetings to, uh…discuss something, but he never mentioned that you had come with him. What are you doing in the Fire Nation?"

Katara was about to answer, when they both heard footsteps on the stone path. They turned, and saw one of the servants approach. She bowed to Zuko, and said "My Lord, General Iroh requests your presence in the dining hall. Dinner is now prepared."

Zuko thanked her and she bowed again before taking her leave. Zuko looked over at Katara. "Well, we shouldn't keep my Uncle waiting. He can be like your brother sometimes, I swear." He motioned for her to follow.

She laughed and started walking beside him. Together they made their way to the dining hall.

* * *

General Iroh sat in his place in the dining hall, patiently waiting for his nephew to arrive. The more he stared at the food before him, the more he disliked the rule that no one could eat until the Fire Lord arrived. Living in the Earth Kingdom he rarely had the chance to have authentic Fire Nation cuisine. Sure, there were restaurants that had recently opened that claimed to have real Fire Nation food on the menu, but they never could get it quite right. Whenever he went to those places, he secretly brought his own spices with him in his sleeve, so that he could make the food taste a little more like home. He had half a mind to pull the chefs at these restaurants aside and show them how it was done.

But back at the palace, there was no need for such precautions. The chefs here knew exactly what he liked and exactly how he liked things prepared. Such was the benefit of living in the palace for so many years before.

Just as his stomach growled for the third time, he heard footfalls in the hallway outside the dining room. A servant stepped through the doorway, and announced the arrival of the Fire Lord and Katara of the Southern Water Tribe.

Iroh smiled and stood up to greet them. He was surprised to see that Zuko seemed to have found Katara. When Iroh had gone to her room, the guard had informed him that she was out for a walk. When he went to Zuko's office, he was nowhere to be found as well. It seems they must have run into each other on the way to dinner.

Zuko sat at the head of the table, with Katara to his left and Iroh to his right. Iroh glanced briefly between the two teenagers, and could sense a little tension in the air while the food was being served. Zuko seemed uncomfortable, and Katara was twisting the end of a lock of her hair. Feeling the need to break the silence (and pry a little) Iroh spoke up.

"Katara, I see that you are wearing one of your new dresses. I must say, it looks absolutely stunning. Don't you agree, Lord Zuko?"

Zuko almost choked on the water he was drinking. He shot a glare at his Uncle, who was smiling benignly at him. He chanced a glance at Katara, who was blushing furiously, and looking at her hands in her lap. Zuko cleared his throat, and while looking down at his food, mumbled "Yes, Uncle. Katara does look very…nice."

"Nice? Is that all, Nephew? Surely your time as Fire Lord has expanded your vocabulary a bit more than that."

Zuko could not believe his ears. What was his Uncle thinking? He turned to his Uncle, eyes wide, mentally pleading for him to stop all of this. After all, Zuko thought, this girl already had a boyfriend, it would be inappropriate for Zuko to make those types of comments and make her feel uncomfortable. If she was too embarrassed, she might not come back! He needed to derail his Uncle from whatever he was thinking.

"I'm sorry, Uncle, the documents I tend to everyday are tragically not filled with flowery language. Tell me, how was your journey to the Fire Nation?"

His Uncle answered him, but he wasn't paying attention. He looked at Katara, who seemed to relax a bit now that there had been a change of subject. But she also looked a little…sad? Why would she be sad? He had said that she looked nice. What reason would she have to look despondent?

The dinner continued without further incident. By the time it had ended, the sun had long since retired for the day. Zuko was relieved and thanked Agni that his Uncle had decided to refrain from making any further embarrassing comments. As the plates were being carried away, Iroh excused himself for the evening, saying that he had to be up early in order to make some trade agreements with the local tea merchant. Zuko stood and bowed to him as he left. He remained standing, still looking toward the doorway that his Uncle had just exited from. He was suddenly painfully aware that he was now alone with Katara, and he had no idea what to say now. _So, how have you been? How's your boyfriend? Why didn't anyone tell me that the two of you were involved? _He could not think of anything remotely appropriate.

Instead, he figured that he would try to escape and deal with all of this tomorrow. "Well, I guess I should follow my Uncle's lead. Goodnight, Katara."

He started walking toward the door, when he felt fingers curl around his wrist. He turned, and saw Katara looking up at him expectantly. When he gazed back at her questioningly, she immediately dropped her eyes to the ground and dropped her hand back to her side.

"Zuko, wait. I was just thinking…well I wasn't really ready to sleep yet…and there's nothing really to do in my room…so I was wondering…would you like to take a walk with me?" she bit her lip a little and looked up at him again.

Zuko's face softened a little at this. He was a little surprised, but happy to accept the offer. Of course he wanted to take a walk with Katara. He had missed this ritual after she had left the palace. But he had been unsure that she would want to continue the tradition, now that she appeared to be in some sort of romantic relationship with the Avatar. In the social circles he was familiar with at the palace, it could appear scandalous. But this was Katara after all, and as he had thought before, if she wanted to interact with him as though nothing had changed, well she was bound to do it. Katara was not one to obey social convention if it interfered with what she wanted to do.

Zuko smiled at her. "Of course, Katara. Where would you like to go?"

Katara was relieved. She had been so worried that he would be too busy, or that he just wouldn't want to spend too much time with her. She had kind of just barged into his daily routine. It wasn't as though he were required to accommodate her.

"Well, why don't we go back to the turtle duck pond? We never got to finish the conversation we started there."

Zuko nodded. They exited the dining hall and walked down the hallways of the palace toward their destination. It was a beautiful night. Yue shined brightly in the clear sky, and the ocean breeze from earlier had died down to an occasional whisper. They walked on in silence, enjoying the night air. When they reached the bench, Katara sat down. Zuko followed suit, but sat as far away from her on the bench as was possible. He didn't want her getting any (correct) ideas, nor did he wish any passing servants to see them and start rumors. Perhaps Katara wasn't concerned with her reputation, but Zuko was. He would not have anyone speaking ill of her around him.

Katara was a little disappointed by Zuko's lack of proximity. Maybe things _weren't_ just as they had been the last time that she was here. She sighed a little to herself, but ever the optimist, thought that maybe he just needed a little time to warm back up to her. After all, it had been almost six months since they had really talked. She supposed that they had a lot to catch up on.

She looked over at Zuko out of the corner of her eye. To anyone else, he might have looked at peace. He was gazing at the pond in front of him, face blank, hands folded in his lap. But Katara knew better. There was a twitch to his jaw that gave him away. Something was bothering him.

"So, Zuko, how's life been as the almighty Fire Lord?" She laughed weakly at this, suddenly feeling awkward around him.

"It's been fine." Zuko kept staring ahead, not wanting to look at her, not wanting to give himself away.

Katara turned and looked at him skeptically. "Fine? That's all you have to say? Surely your time as Fire Lord has expanded your vocabulary more than that, hmm?" She joked, reaching over and nudging him with her elbow.

Zuko flushed a bit at the reference to his Uncle's ridiculous comment at dinner. He was glad for the darkness, hoping that she couldn't see the color rising in his cheeks. Instead of answering, he reached up and pulled the royal emblem out of his hair and loosened his top knot so that his hair hung in his face a bit. He held the piece in his hands, turning it over a few times, watching the moonlight softly reflect off of it.

He sighed, shoulders slumping slightly. "It's exhausting. And intimidating. And boring. And overwhelming. It's everything I expected it to be. It's also nothing like I expected it to be. Is that better?" He turned his head and gave her a wry smile.

Katara smiled back and took the crown from his hands. She too turned it over in her hands a few times, considering it. "So much responsibility for such a small thing, isn't it? But you're doing well. I've heard of many of the great things that you have done since your coronation to make this a better nation."

Zuko watched her play with the emblem. "I suppose. I have a team of advisors who help me, as well as advice from Uncle. The paperwork is the worst part, to be honest. But enough about that. What are you doing here Katara? Not that I'm not happy to see you, but it is a bit unexpected."

It was just like Zuko to get straight to the point about things, Katara thought. She handed his crown back to him. "Well, I was going to talk to you about that back in Ba Sing Se, but you just sort of disappeared on us. What was so important that you had to rush off without saying goodbye?"

Zuko panicked a little. He hadn't really thought of a specific excuse to tell anyone, and he wasn't sure if she had gotten any information from his Uncle. He chose to be vague. "It was just something that had to be taken care of immediately here at the palace. Some papers that needed to be signed that couldn't wait until my scheduled return. What were you planning to discuss with me?"

Katara wasn't entirely convinced, but chose to let him off with a mild chiding. "Well, you still could have said something to us." She gently nudged him again. "Anyway, as you know, I have been travelling around with Aang for awhile, helping with the reconstruction effort all over the Earth Kingdom. We finished with phase one of the plans, and I thought that maybe my help might be needed elsewhere. I was planning on asking you if I could be of service to the Fire Nation." _And I wanted to spend some time with you because I missed you_. But she wasn't about to reveal that just yet.

Zuko looked at her and shook his head in amazement. "Don't you ever rest? I'm certain that I could find something for you to do if you wanted it. However, it might take some time to figure out where you could be of the most help. How long were you planning to stay?" Zuko realized that he absurdly hoped that she might say 'forever.'

"Until I'm no longer needed. I don't have any immediate plans for the future. I'm ready to stay in one place for awhile. The constant travelling is exhausting in its own way. I think it would be nice to stay in the Fire Nation for awhile."

"You are more than welcome here, Katara. I'll speak to my advisors and see what you can do." He looked back at the pond, and was silent for a moment. Before he could stop himself, he suddenly blurted, "Won't you miss Aang?"

Katara was a little confused by this. What was that supposed to mean? "Of course I'll miss Aang. I'll miss all of our friends. Why do you ask?" She looked at him in bewilderment.

"No reason," Zuko muttered, feeling ridiculous. He wasn't sure how to interpret this answer, but it didn't appear that she was partial to the Avatar in any way. But nothing was certain. He knew what he had seen on that tea shop patio.

Zuko stood up and stretched a little. "It's getting late. I have meetings to attend early tomorrow morning. May I walk you back to your room?"

Katara smiled and stood up. She bowed in an overly dramatic fashion. "It would be an honor, Lord Zuko." She giggled and watched him roll his eyes. He held out his arm to escort her back through the palace. She entwined her arm around his, happy to finally have some sort of physical contact with him.

They reached her room, and Katara bid him goodnight. As she was about to shut the door, Zuko stopped her. "Katara, wait."

Katara looked up at him expectantly, those large blue eyes catching him in a trance momentarily. He wasn't sure what had made him stop her, but it was too late now. "I'm sorry for what I said at dinner tonight."

Katara made a face. "What are you talking about Zuko?"

Zuko inwardly kicked himself. What was he doing? But there was nothing left to do but continue on, he supposed. "At dinner, I…I said that you looked nice."

Katara frowned at him, putting her hands on her hips. "What do you mean? Are you taking it back? What – "

"Katara." He cut her off, holding up his hand to silence her. He looked down the hallway for a moment, gathering his courage. He took a deep breath, and looked back into her eyes. "I said that you looked nice. What I meant to say is that you look beautiful."

She looked at him for a moment, blinking, her face unreadable. He was certain he had said the wrong thing. What had compelled him to do something so stupid? He was hitting on the Avatar's girlfriend! Now she would never want to spend time alone with him again, for fear of more uncomfortable commentary! She would probably just leave and then go back to Aang and tell him how ridiculous Zuko was, and they would laugh, and—

His thoughts were cut off abruptly as his arms were suddenly full of Katara. She had wrapped her arms around his neck and was holding onto him tightly. He tentatively returned the gesture. He felt her breath on his ear as she whispered "thank you, Zuko." She slowly released him, and smiled up into his face. He looked back at her, a little stunned, and he swore that he could see some color in her cheeks before she spun on her heels to go back into her room. She called out a brief goodnight as she was shutting the door.

Zuko remained outside her door, staring at the space she had just occupied. Did that really just happen? He shook his head, unsure what to think about her. He certainly couldn't complain, but he didn't want to get his hopes up either. Katara _was_ famous for her mood swings. And she had that motherly side to her as well. Yes, that had to be it. She was just happy to see him, and apparently very susceptible to compliments. Everything would go back to normal in the morning. He chanced a quick glance around to make sure that no gossipy servants had witnessed anything. He wondered vaguely where the guard was that should have been posted outside her door, but counted himself lucky that the guard had taken an unauthorized break.

Despite all of his negative thoughts, he couldn't help but feel that his steps were a little lighter as he walked back to his room, posture relaxed, arms crossed behind his back. And he couldn't keep a little smile from creeping onto his face. Things might actually be looking up. That night, he slept soundly for the first time in weeks.

* * *

That same evening, in a small fishing village in the northern Earth Kingdom, the owner of a combined tavern and inn was getting ready to close up shop for the night. The village itself was small, but the tavern managed to bring in plenty of customers, mostly travelers. The village was located near trading ports that often accommodated the Northern Water Tribe, making it a very lucrative point among the trading route that ran along the coast. The locals enjoyed the frequent visitors to the town, and most didn't cause any trouble. The tavern owner certainly didn't mind the travelers, as they translated into a healthy wage with which to care for his family.

He surveyed the barroom, and saw that most of his customers had left for the evening. A local man occupied one table near the center of the room, head resting on his folded arms, half a glass of ale resting on the table next to him. He was always one of the last to leave, and often needed to be woken up and told to go home to his wife and three young children. At another table near him, a couple of young men were standing to leave, finishing off what was left of their glasses and depositing some coins on the table. He watched them leave, and then went over to the table to collect their money and dirty mugs.

The tavern owner moved back behind the bar and began to clean the glasses. As he wiped out the inside of a mug with a rag, he glanced at the only other customer that still remained in the tavern. In a dusty corner of the bar, a woman sat alone with her back toward him, staring blankly out of the window to her right. He couldn't imagine what she could be looking at, darkness had fallen hours ago.

She was an odd one. She was here more nights than not, and always occupied the same lonely table in the corner. She never brought anyone with her, nor did she ever interact with the other customers. She had become a silent fixture in the tavern. For almost three years she had repeated this same pattern. The locals were so used to her being there that on occasion he had seen them encourage travelers to sit elsewhere if they tried to sit in her spot.

And always tea. She never indulged in any of the ale or whiskey that he had to offer. It was always the same blend of tea. As he continued wiping down the bar, he watched her as she raised her cup to her mouth. Her movements were always deliberate, and when she wasn't in motion she sat perfectly still, with excellent posture. The tavern owner could not determine her age. If he had to judge by her face, then she seemed young, but her hands betrayed her and provided clues that she was older than she looked. Her hair also gave her away, for while it was dark and shining, a few strands of white were starting to appear at her temples. Her clothing was nondescript, perhaps a little threadbare but still meticulously taken care of. She was an attractive woman, but forgettable: it would have been easy to pass her over without a second look in a crowd.

Not much was known about this woman although she had been a resident of the village for several years. She had a name, but most people had forgotten it and instead referred to her as the Seamstress. She occupied a small hut at the edge of the village, and made her living repairing the villagers clothing or creating pretty new dresses for special occasions. She was friendly to customers, and charged a fair price for her work, but other than that she kept to herself. It seemed the only time she was seen outside of her home was to come to the tavern a few nights a week.

The tavern owner watched as she gracefully stood, and carefully placed a few coins on the table. She half turned and gave the tavern owner a small smile before making her way out the front door and into the night.

* * *

The Seamstress walked the short distance to her home, the only sound in the night coming from the gravel road crunching underneath her feet. When she arrived at her destination, her home was dark just as she had left it. She entered and closed the door. Surveying the dark room around her, and seeing that all of the curtains were shut tight, she lit a small fire in the palm of her hand.

The fire illuminated her modest belongings that were placed about in the three room hut. In the front room, she kept her sewing equipment and a simple chair that she used to work in. The room to the left was her kitchen, and the room in the back was her bedroom. After lighting a lantern in the front room, she made her way to the bedroom.

She sat down carefully on the single bed, and looked across to a mirror on the wall. She studied her reflection for a moment, and then lay back on the bed, feet still flat on the floor. She reached up and rubbed her temples.

There was no new information tonight. But then again, tonight had not been very busy, the large trading vessels weren't scheduled to arrive until tomorrow. She could always count on travelers to supply information on the outside world. She had sat in the tavern for years, quietly, while various merchants and traders drank their ale and loudly shared stories about the comings and goings of the other nations. But tonight the tavern had been occupied by mostly locals, and they rarely had any information except mindless gossip about their neighbors. She was much more interested in what was happening on a global scale.

No, there had been no new information tonight. But she wasn't sure that she really needed any more information than she already had. She had just overheard two nights ago from some rice peddlers that the Fire Lord and the Dragon of the West were both back at the palace. Through bits and pieces of information, she had learned that the Fire Nation had finally secured its peaceful place among the nations, and the new Fire Lord was slowly bringing prosperity back to the war torn country. Ozai was weakened and imprisoned, and the ex-Fire Princess had been taken care of almost directly after the war had ended. Azula had been imprisoned like her father, but the fact that she still had her bending had made the people nervous. It had taken little more than a week before one of the servants had slipped a slow acting poison into her food which first paralyzed and ultimately killed her. The Fire Lord had commanded that the physicians do whatever was necessary to heal her, but they were unsuccessful. Or at least that was what was said. There were rumors that the physicians hadn't tried their best in the matter. While deplorable, if true it would have been just as unsurprising as the poisoning itself. Many of the nation's citizens were more afraid of Azula than Ozai himself. Many attended her grand state funeral, but it was noticed by some that while everyone was somber, no one cried. The culprit behind the poisoning was found and promptly executed. The criminal's last words had been "cherry pits," which had made sense to absolutely no one. Many times she had overheard drunken men in the tavern joke that the culprit should have been given official commendation instead. She always bristled at this, and found that she had to struggle to keep her face neutral at such comments. But there was nothing she could do about it now. All in all, however, things finally seemed to be coming together. After all of these years, it seemed like the time was finally right.

She sat up and moved over to a desk in the corner, preparing to write a letter. She pulled out a brush and a fresh piece of paper, deliberating over exactly what she wanted to say. There was so much to be said, and so much of it deserved to be delivered in person. But no matter. A brief synopsis would do, she could explain all of her actions in detail later. What was necessary right now was simply to establish first contact. Things would flow from there.

She signed the document and sealed it, preparing it for delivery by messenger hawk. Although it was late, the delivery service was open in the village at all hours in the case of important trade announcements. She stepped outside of her home and made the short trip to the aviary.

She spoke briefly with the boy who was in charge of the night shift. He quirked an eyebrow at the letters destination, but made no comment. He tucked the document inside a leather cylinder and set it aside, telling her that it would be sent off first thing in the morning when one of the hawks returned. She thanked him and returned home.

Back in her bedroom, she sat down on the bed once more. She felt happy for the first time in years. She reached underneath the mattress and pulled out a scroll. The edges were a bit frayed, and it was a bit faded from the sun, as she had taken it off of a community message board that was placed in the center of town. She had removed it and taken it home with her one night after she left the tavern, vigilant about making sure that no one was watching as she did. She often looked at it before going to sleep at night. Tonight, however, instead of returning it to its place underneath the mattress, she tacked it up on the opposite wall. After she had finished, she sat back down on the bed and admired it.

It was an announcement that depicted the new Fire Lord, celebrating his coronation six months ago. He looked handsome in those robes, she thought, so different. But she would recognize him anywhere.

She extinguished the lantern with a flick of the wrist, and reclined into her bed. She looked at the scroll once more and smiled softly at it before closing her eyes. "Good night, my son. I will see you soon."

It was time for Ursa to come home.

* * *

The boy at the aviary jerked his head up for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. He was hunched over the front desk, head supported by his hands, trying desperately not to fall asleep but failing miserably. He was sure that this had to be one of the worst jobs in the whole of the Earth Kingdom. Sure, it paid alright, but these hours were just unnatural. He envied everyone who was sleeping comfortably in their beds at this moment, as people ought to be doing at this time of night. He sat up and blinked his eyes a few times, trying to figure out what he could do tonight to keep himself occupied.

As he thought, his eyes drifted about the room aimlessly, until they fell on the stack of scrolls that were to be sent out when the morning shift arrived. Curious, he stood up and shuffled over to the pile, yawning and stretching as he approached. There were plenty of scrolls to be sent, but most of them were strictly business, and he could care less about the trading vessels or the price of grain. But there was one letter than piqued his interest, only because the destination was unusual, as was the sender.

Since the end of the war, communications between the northern Earth Kingdom and the Fire Nation had increased, but not by much. Any trade that was done between the two was generally handled by those who came along the coastal trading route, which was slow going. There was rarely any trade news from the Fire Nation that was so important that it had to be delivered by hawk. But the boy knew that this letter did not contain industry news.

The Seamstress rarely communicated with the villagers, and she had never been known to communicate with anyone in the greater Earth Kingdom, let alone anyone outside of the continent. And no one in the village had ever had any reason to send something directly to the Fire Nation palace, addressed to the Fire Lord himself.

Time spent at this job had taught the boy very few skills, but one thing that he had become good at in the creeping hours of night had been removing seals. When he was particularly bored, he would find letters that were addressed to villagers family members in other parts of the Earth Kingdom, and he would occasionally pry these open, if just to entertain himself and learn a little gossip. It was amazing what neighbors would say behind each other's backs when the information was sure not to get back to them. The first few times he tried this trick it was a disaster, but over time he learned that just a gradual heating of the wax would break it free, and a gradual heating of the wax would seal it once more.

Maybe there was nothing important in this letter to the palace, but his curiosity was too strong. After all, how many of these letters would he get a chance to read in the future? His mind made up, he carefully opened the scroll.

His eyes quickly scanned the short note and the character at the end symbolizing who the letter was from. He glanced back up at the night, eyes unfocused, certain that he must be asleep at the desk, pleasantly dreaming. This was impossible. He looked back down at the scroll and read it twice more, slowly, making sure that he was not misunderstanding a single word. But the words and their meaning did not change. This wasn't just a letter to the palace. This was a letter to the palace from a Fire Nation royal. A member of the royal family that had been missing for years.

The boy knew of the Fire Lord's search for his long lost mother. Gossip was prevalent in the village, and he always kept his ears open, supplementing his knowledge with the scrolls that he would read during the night shift. He knew that the Fire Lord had sent out a special team of people to gather information about where his mother might be, if she was still alive. And to think that she had been here in this tiny village for the last three years and no one even noticed.

This information was too good. Sure the job he had paid him decently, but just imagine what someone might pay for this type of information. Someone like the Fire Lord, with his palace and servants and processions.

He carefully rolled the scroll back up and put it with his things, and anxiously waited for his shift to end. When the time finally came and he was relieved from his duties, he raced home. Upon arrival, he flung open the front door, not bothering to shut it behind him, and ran to the back room where his older brother was still sleeping.

He crouched by the side of the bed and shook him awake. "Wake up! I have news! You won't believe this!"

His brother sat halfway up on one elbow and ground the sleep from his eyes with his knuckle. "What is so important that you wake me up at this hour? The sun hasn't even risen yet! Go to sleep."

"No! You must listen! The Seamstress came to the aviary tonight and gave me a letter to send to the Fire Nation palace. In the letter it said– "

"You opened it? Why would you – "

"Shut up! That's not important! The letter is addressed to the Fire Lord himself. The Seamstress claims that she is the long lost Lady Ursa, and that she plans to travel home to him in a week's time!"

The older brother sat all the way up at this. "Do you have the letter?" His younger brother nodded and pulled it out of his bag. "Let me see it." He read it over carefully, and then slowly met his brother's eyes. "Do you know what this means?"

"Yes! I'm sure the Fire Lord would pay a handsome reward for this information, and – "

"No. I think I may know of some people who would grant us an even greater reward. Give me the letter. You've done a good thing, brother. I know of some people who live not far from here in the woods. I will speak with them later today. In the meantime, don't tell anyone about this. Understood?"

The younger brother nodded and bid his brother good day. He found his way to his own room, and lay down in his bed. He wasn't sure who his brother had been talking about, but he had never done wrong for them in the past. This could be their ticket out of this town, and into the riches and splendor of Ba Sing Se. No more long hours at the aviary, no more gossipy village, just the life of luxury in the city. Yes, that was the way to live. He had every confidence in his brother. Now all he had to do was wait. What could possibly go wrong?

* * *

A/N part II: oooohhhh intrigue! So in this chapter we finally get some Zuko/Katara interaction, both awkward and fluffy. Hope you enjoyed their little scene outside of Katara's room, it may have been a little cheesy, but I couldn't help myself.

As for the second part of the chapter: yep this is turning into a post war Ursa kind of thing, but with some twists that I don't think have been used before. Oh, and don't mind the random non-characters. I don't think I could see myself creating any OC's, so don't worry about them. Sometimes I guess I like to see things from stranger's perspectives. But I won't name them or give them concerte personalities or anything. I have my hands full keeping the real characters in character without making up my own!

So who are those people inhabiting the woods? And what would they want with information about Lady Ursa? Stay tuned to find out! Thanks for reading! Please review, it makes my heart giggle with joy. ;)


	4. Chapter 3

_A/N: So….I know it has been months since I updated this. I got a little stuck in the middle, and then I got busy, and then even when it was finished, I have to proofread the thing about four times with fresh eyes before I post. I just wanted to assure everyone that this story is __**not**__ dead, it's just going to be slow going. The bad news is that as a doctoral student, I have a lot on my plate. The good news is that I sat down and have at least the next chapter planned out, and a more clear focus of where all of this is going. Funny part is, it's nothing like I originally imagined. And I think plot-wise it'll be something new, I don't think it's been done before. Anyway, I can't guarantee anything in terms of speediness, but I can guarantee that that story will eventually have the word "complete" after it. A thousand apologies for the delay, and I hope you enjoy the next installment of _If It Kills Me_! _

PS – I don't own Avatar.

Chapter 4

He was about to give up. The older brother had been walking through the woods beyond the village all afternoon, and he was beginning to grow weary. So far, there had been no indication at all that anyone had been in this forest for quite some time. There were no abandoned campsites, no old fire pits. There weren't even any tracks on the ground except those that had been left behind by small animals. The only sounds were the occasional twitter of small birds, and the humming of some insects that were coming out now that dusk was approaching.

The path that he had been following had disappeared a long time ago, making the trek harder than he had anticipated. In truth, he had never been this far away from the village. A fallen tree up ahead looked sturdy enough to sit upon, so he decided to rest. He plopped down, feet aching, relieved to be still for a moment. He pulled the letter from the Seamstress out of his shirt and read it again. Could it really be true? If it were, this was a stroke of luck for him and his brother. How he had wished to escape the small village and move on to bigger and better things in Ba Sing Se. Their parents had both been gone for some time, their mother of illness and their father a casualty of the war. He wanted to take his brother somewhere where there was more opportunity, more chance to grow and be free. This information could be their ticket out.

But where were these men? He had heard so many tales about them. It was said that they were dangerous, but the stories were probably exaggerated, as is wont to happen in gossipy small towns. However, the farther he travelled into the woods, the more he was beginning to doubt their existence. Could the stories just have been tales concocted to keep children from roaming too far from home? He certainly hoped not, or he had wasted a lot of time and a day's wage.

He sighed, and put the letter back into his shirt. Whether these men were real or not, it would be dark soon, and the animals that would come out of the trees would be real for sure. He stood up, disappointed, but sure of the fact that it was time to turn around and head back home. His brother would surely be worried about him, and he hoped to assure him that he was alright before he headed to his shift at the aviary.

He took one last look around, and then started back. He had only gone about ten paces when he heard a branch snap from somewhere behind him. He stopped and listened, hoping that an animal hadn't caught up with him after all. Hearing no other noise, he proceeded carefully, if not a little more quickly, in the direction of the village. He hadn't gone another ten paces before the ground dropped out beneath him.

* * *

Toph was irritated. Certainly not as irritated as she might have been if she were home with her suffocating parents, but this difference was only slight. She currently sat in an ice cold room on a cot in the Northern Water Tribe, arms crossed and foot tapping, counting the minutes until she could leave. Her small form was practically lost underneath the enormous parka that she wore. And the boots! The boots were enormous! Those articles of clothing had been unceremoniously tossed into the corner of her temporary living space until she needed to go outside again. At least the floor of this room was covered in plush rugs so her toes wouldn't freeze off, but that was not the case when she needed to go outside. Not that it mattered much, boots or no boots, she couldn't see with all that damn ice. Not being able to see made her feel helpless, and helpless was not something that Toph handled well. The memory of the incident at the Serpent's pass jumped into her mind unbidden, and she quickly dismissed it for multiple reasons.

"_Sure I'll come to the Northern Water Tribe with you Aang! It'll be fun_!" she said to herself in a mocking tone. "What was I thinking?" She huffed, blowing her bangs out of her eyes.

There was a knock at her door, and she turned her head toward the sound. With the distortions caused by the ice, she couldn't tell whose feet were standing beyond the door. From what she could tell, it was either Aang or some small child. Better not make any stupid remarks in case it was some bureaucrat's dumb kid bringing her something. And if it was some kid, better just keep quiet all together so they go away. _Not being able to see takes all the fun out of snarky commentary_, she thought to herself.

"Toph, you in there?" It was Aang. Thank the spirits.

She yelled for him to come in. He crossed the room and sat down beside her on her cot, close enough so that their legs touched. This was merely practical, she told herself, so that she would be able to feel his vibrations better. He knew that she missed being able to 'see' people the way she normally did. It didn't stop her own heart from racing a bit though, and she was glad that she hadn't taught the Avatar _all_ of her tricks.

"So Twinkletoes, when do we get out of this ice box? My feet are very unhappy."

"It shouldn't take much longer Toph. The Northern Water Tribe and the Earth Kingdom are natural allies; they just have a few more details to work out regarding a few trading ports and tariffs. Chief Arnook wasn't concerned that there would be a problem, he really invited us here so we could give him an opinion on the new Earth King."

"Ugh, is that it? Well, what's he like?"

"Well, you can tell he's still trying to get adjusted to the job. After the occupation of Ba Sing Se they had some trouble trying to figure out who would succeed Kuei after he ran off with Bosco. They eventually found his second cousin somewhere, living in the lower ring. There was some controversy, but he was eventually crowned. He's a little rough around the edges, but he'll get the hang of it I'm sure. I mean, he's got lots of people around him to help him out."

_Aang, always the optimist_. "That's all fine and good, but I don't mind telling you that I can't wait to get out of here. It's not that the people aren't nice and all, but two weeks of actually being blind is more than I can take. This is worse than when Zuko burned my feet! For one, it didn't last as long as this because Katara was able to heal them a little, and as a bonus I got to boss Zuko around. And…Aang, are you even listening to me?"

She was picking up a sense of tension from Aang, especially when she mentioned Zuko and Katara. She turned to face him a little, waving a hand in front of where she figured his face would be. "Hello! Earth to Avatar! When someone is speaking to you, the polite response is to listen."

Aang wanted to tell Toph that she was not one to be instructing people on the ways of manners, but instead just sighed. He leaned over, and put his head in his hands, staring at the floor below.

Toph rolled her eyes, but had an inclination of what that was all about. "Twinkletoes, I suggest you spit it out. Whatever is bothering you is going to keep up until you talk about it. You're terrible at solving your own problems."

"I am not!" Aang replied indignantly, but his heart wasn't really in it. He slumped again. "Nothing's wrong Toph. I'll be fine."

"I do believe you are acquainted with my lie-detecting ability, and at this moment it is going through the roof. Instead of beating around the bush, let's just get it out in the open: you miss her don't you?"

Aang turned her way, searching her face, and then returned his head to his hands. "I don't know why I even try with you Toph. You always see right through me. Pardon the pun." With this, he offered her a small smile. "You're right. I do miss her. Since she woke me up, we haven't really been apart for any long periods of time. I get that she wants her space and wants to stop traveling for awhile, but it's strange not seeing her every day. When I pictured the world finally at peace, I pictured us enjoying it together…"

Not one to get involved in this mushy trap, Toph responded, "look, the sooner we leave this place, the sooner we can travel to warmer climates, and who knows? Maybe we can run into Katara in the Fire Nation. I wouldn't mind stopping by the palace, as Zuko technically owes me penance for the rest of his life. He may not know that part yet, so don't mention it to him. What do you say?"

Aang seemed to perk up a bit at the idea. "Great idea Toph! I'm sure there's someplace in the Fire Nation that needs the Avatar's help! I'll try to get these negotiations finished as soon as possible!" Then he was off, sprinting down the hallways that would lead him to Chief Arnook's quarters.

Toph felt him go, and stared blankly in the direction of his departure for some time. The empty space that he filled only moments ago made the whole room feel a little bit colder.

* * *

When he awoke, the first thing he noticed was that his head was pounding. He tentatively opened his eyes, and was instantly confused. Where was he? He squeezed his eyes shut against the pain in his head. Slowly the memory of walking through the forest returned to him. He remembered deciding to return home, but then what? He remembered falling, but couldn't remember why. He was pretty sure he hadn't tripped over anything. He decided that it wasn't of much consequence, all that mattered was that he needed to get home.

He opened his eyes again, letting them adjust to the darkness. He seemed to be surrounded by dirt. There was a dim light source coming from behind him. He tried to turn his head to see where the light was coming from, but realized that his head was held firmly in place. What was going on? He struggled to move his head, but stopped as it made the pain in his head worse. He tried to reach up to figure out what was restraining him, and found his wrists to be bound to the arms of the chair that he was sitting in. His initial grogginess dissolved quickly into panic. He struggled against his restraints, but was unsuccessful. Sweat began to break out on his forehead, and his breath became shallow.

"Hello?" He called out. "Is anyone there?"

Silence. His eyes shifted about the room, trying to get more information about where he could be, or how he might escape. In front of him, however, there was nothing but a rounded dirt wall, and above him a dirt ceiling. He seemed to be at some sort of dead end. The only thing in the room that was within his sight and not made of earth was a small metal railing that appeared at eye level. None of this made any sense. How did he even get here?

"Hello?" He tried again. "Please, is someone there? Help me!"

This time something shifted behind him. He was almost sorry that he had yelled, he suddenly didn't want to know where he was, or who was back there. He heard a small shuffling of feet approaching, and squeezed his eyes shut again. The shuffling became louder and then stopped in front of him. He took a deep breath and opened his eyes.

In front of him stood a rather plain looking man, in typical, albeit tattered, earth kingdom attire. He didn't speak, he just stood in front of the boy, arms folded behind his back. He didn't look the least bit intimidating, except there was something off in the way he looked at the boy, something calculating.

But the boy didn't care about that. All he knew was that he was injured and trapped, and now he was no longer alone. "Sir! Thank the spirits you're here! Listen, you have to help—"

"Who are you, and what are you doing in these woods?" The man commanded. The boy shut up immediately. His relief at seeing this man dissolved into panic once more, as the man eyed him sternly and made no move to help him.

He took a deep breath. "I-I came looking for the rebels that I heard lived in this forest. I meant no harm. I have information that I believe they would be interested in." He congratulated himself for not stuttering as much as he wanted to in this moment.

"What makes you think that there are such people?" His voice echoed in the small space. The man remained still, continuing to stare at the boy.

"I don't know—I heard tales I guess—in the village that I'm from—rebels, defectors, something—look, could you please help me out of here? I need to get home—"

"What kind of information could you possibly have that would interest such people?"

The boy suddenly found courage that he had no right to possess at the moment. "Hey, I'm not sharing it with you! It's my ticket out of the village! You'll just go and use it for yours—"

He was cut off by a hard slap to his face, causing the pain that was in his head to bloom behind his eyes momentarily. He sat, stunned into speechlessness.

"I repeat: what kind of information could you possibly possess that would interest such people?" The man's face crept closer to his own as he spoke, and the boy shrank into his seat as much as was possible.

"It – it's in my shirt. My shirt pocket," he whispered, all hope draining from him.

"Good boy." The man reached into his shirt and retrieved the scroll. He read it, his expression never changing as though he were simply reading a list for the market and not a piece of groundbreaking news. When finished, he rolled it back up and placed it carefully within his own robes.

The boy was too scared to protest. At this point he just wanted to go home. Cooperation was key. Perhaps he just needed to do whatever this man asked, and he would help him out of the situation. Before he could gather the courage to politely ask the man to help him out of his restraints, he noticed a shift in the shadows. The light source from behind him seemed to be moving. He saw it, out of the corner of his eye, and then it swung around in front of him, following the path of the rail that he had identified earlier. Slowly, the man in front of him bent down, so that he was at eye level with the boy. The boy couldn't help but stare at the man as he crept closer, until he was inches from his face. He stared at him, all the while the light swung round and round, and then the man began to speak.

"There is no group of rebels in the forest….You have no information regarding Fire Lady Ursa….There is no group of rebels in the forest…."

* * *

When the boy awoke, his head ached. He sat up, and took in his surroundings. He was at the edge of the forest, and it was dark. A village could be seen just up ahead, a few lights shining from the some of the homes. He reached up and flinched when he touched a large bump that had formed on his head. When he looked down, there were bruises on his wrists. What had happened? Why was he injured, and why was he sleeping on the ground on the outskirts of a village? He wracked his brain, but nothing was coming. He couldn't remember anything about today. He wasn't even sure where he was. This was not the place that he lived. A cold wind rushed through the trees, telling him that he needed to find shelter for the night. He stood up and brushed himself off, starting out toward the nearby village. Perhaps some sleep in an actual bed would clear his head, and he could figure this out in the morning.

* * *

A week later, Zuko left one of his council meetings with some good news. He stepped out into the courtyard, stretching his back until he heard a satisfying popping sound. He was relieved to be standing after sitting for so long. He cast his eyes around the courtyard in search of a certain waterbender. His eyes caught a glimpse of brown hair shifting behind a bush and approached. As he turned down the path and glanced around the bush, he encountered just what he was expecting. There was Katara, sitting languidly on the ground by the turtle duck pond, lazily tossing crumbs to the animals. She glanced to her right, and noticing boots, looked up smilingly at the Fire Lord. He returned the smile as he crouched down beside her, careful not to let his robes trail in the pond.

"I'm glad to have found you. You told me that you would like to offer your services to the Fire Nation, and the council agrees that that would be most welcome. As you might have guessed, your healing abilities are quite sought after, especially as more of our troops return home. Your talents would be greatly appreciated at the local clinic."

"Oh Zuko, that's great!" She reached for him in a sort of half hug. "When do I get to start? Can I go over there now?"

He chuckled at her reaction before growing serious. "Calm down, Katara. First, some ground rules. You are never to go into the city before dawn or after dusk. You will be accompanied at all times by two of my best guards. If anything, and I mean _anything _untoward occurs, my men are expected to report immediately back to me."

"Ugh!" Katara huffed, crossing her arms. "Do you really think that's necessary? I mean, master waterbender here! I think I can handle walking to the clinic!"

"Yes, I think it is necessary. The world is still becoming accustomed to peace. There are still in this city people who are uncomfortable with non-nationals. As our guest, I will not stand for any of my citizens harassing you. I know that these are not the most optimal terms, but I hope that you will still consider them."

Of course she wanted the job, even if Zuko was going to act all paranoid about it. Still, she sat for a moment, making an exaggerated show of thinking it over, eyebrow quirked, stroking her chin thoughtfully with one hand. Then Katara looked at him with a smirk on her face. "I see, Fire Lord, that you are skilled in the ways of diplomacy. I will accept these terms as you see fit." She bowed her head in a mock fashion, giggling.

Zuko smiled and rolled his eyes. "Well that's a relief. Because Plan B was to send you down to help dig trenches for the new water irrigation system."

Katara's eyes went wide before bursting out laughing. "Zuko! Did you just make a joke?"

"I suppose I did. Tell no one. My reputation would be in ruins." He smirked back at her, and she lightly elbowed him in the arm. "You may start as early as tomorrow. I will be available to take you there myself later this afternoon for a tour, if you would like."

"Of course, this is so exciting!"

"I'll send my servants around the third candle mark to retrieve you. Please be ready. I have a few more meetings to attend to, and then I will be ready myself. Until then?" She nodded, and he smiled before walking off to attend yet another bout of squabbling grown men.

* * *

The ride through the capitol was less glamorous than Katara had expected. The clinic she was to work in was in a more poverty stricken area, far removed from the beauty of the palace and it surrounding areas. Katara leaned over to Zuko in the palanquin, and said, "not the greatest part of town, eh?"

Zuko looked out the sides of the palanquin, and looked back to her. "Aren't you glad I insisted on those guards?" She rolled her eyes. He smiled, but then his faced clouded over and he sighed. "No, unfortunately the place that needs you most is out here. These people sent many sons to war. Many families depended on the income that their sons would send, and now that these soldiers have returned and are out of work, they have no money to pay for the fancier hospitals in the capitol. They must rely on smaller local clinics. Your help here will be paramount. I think we are approaching now."

Ahead of them was their destination. It was a health clinic, if one could call it that, as the exterior paint was peeling off and one of the windows was cracked. It looked as though it had been abandoned, but as soon as the palanquin came to a stop in front of it, a woman poked her head out and smiled. She quickly ducked her head back in to shush people who appeared to be crowding the doorway, anxious to see their new co-worker. The original woman, the head nurse by her uniform, stepped back out, and bowed low to the Fire Lord.

"My Lord, we have been expecting you. I hope your travels here were pleasant. Please allow us to escort you and our new addition through the clinic."

Katara, who had been on the other side of the palanquin, had not been able to see the transaction that was transpiring, but was excited nonetheless. The people sounded nice enough. She slid open the curtain on the palanquin and stepped around to the other side, smiling in anticipation of greeting them in person.

The faces she met on the other side were unsmiling, set into looks of contempt, or possibly disgust. Katara's smile fell slowly from her face, and she tried to pick the leader. She faced the old woman and bowed in the traditional way, and said that she was grateful for the opportunity to work with them. She looked up, and none of the faces had changed except they were now focusing their attentions on Zuko.

"My Lord," the head nurse began," you did not tell us you were bringing us a…waterbender." The distaste at the last word was clear.

The Fire Lord was incensed, but in control. "Madame, I would like to introduce you to Katara, Master Waterbender and Daughter to Chief Hakoda of the Southern Water Tribes. Her healing abilities are unparalleled, and she would be an extraordinary addition to your team. Her wish is to help heal the wounded soldiers that this war has brought back to us. Is that not your same goal?"

The head nurse was at a loss, she was nervous in front of authority, and it was obvious. "It is, but My Lord, don't you think—"

"I think, Madame, that you will wait to judge her until you have seen her skills. If they are unsatisfactory, please feel free to inform me directly. However, while we are outside bickering over _qualifications_, there are men and women in there who need assistance. Shall we?" His gesture toward the door was brisk, his eyes daring her to further the conversation.

"Yes, My Lord." The head nurse sighed, defeated. She didn't dare defy the Fire Lord. "Please follow me, I will show you around the clinic."

She opened the door, and all of the women waiting behind it stepped back and pretended to quickly get back to their duties. But not before glancing at the woman who was now supposed to join them. Zuko turned to Katara, and with a sad smile, held out his arm to her before stepping over the threshold.

She took it gratefully, she needed something familiar to cling to during this situation. Katara was by no means a withering flower that needed protection; if it were up to her she would have water-whipped these women into the next moon cycle for their implications. However, she knew that Zuko had worked hard to obtain her this position, and she didn't want to embarrass him. Above all, she had come to the Fire Nation to be of help and try to bridge the gap between the nations. This was her chance to shine, and she would do it, even in the face of these stodgy women who were clearly set in their ways. To alleviate the tension, she felt the need to tease Zuko a bit about his conversation with the woman.

She leaned over to whisper to him, "Very intimidating, Fire Lord. Such eloquent threatening."

"I didn't threaten! I – oh forget it. Let's just take the tour and be done with it."

The tour was short, as the clinic was a small building with only 25 beds to keep the sick and wounded. Seventeen were currently occupied, mostly with soldiers who had been injured during the war. Katara released Zuko's arm and immediately rushed to the one closest to her. From the placement of his bandages, it appeared that he was injured in both legs as well as his ribs.

She kneeled down, to be on level with the man she spoke, and said "Hello! My name is Katara, and I am new to the clinic. I am a well-trained healer, and I would like to help you. What is your name, and how can I help you?"

The soldier turned his head to look at her. He slowly eyed her up and down, and then turned his head back away. She could hear him mutter, "I don't want any help, at least not from you."

Katara was shocked. She couldn't say that she hadn't expected this kind of resistance, but it still stung. She briefly remembered offering to heal Iroh….were all Fire Nation citizens so reluctant to ask for help? Was it pride, or just the color of her eyes? She was so dumfounded by the man's response that she just stared at him.

Zuko pulled her back up to her feet, and whispered in her ear, "Perhaps we should get back to the palace." Katara nodded, and soon they were back in the palanquin, headed back to Zuko's home.

The ride back was spent in silence, each lost in their own thoughts. Katara was still dumbfounded about how poorly that had gone. Not to be defeated, she began slowly to strategize about healing those who were resistant to help based on stupid biases. Meanwhile, Zuko, was brooding about the rudeness of his citizens. An amazing healer is placed before them, and they act as though she is beneath them based on her country of origin. They should be ashamed! A puff of smoke issued from his nose as he snorted in disgust. Katara looked up, but went back to her own musings shortly after.

After an equally silent and brooding dinner, Zuko invited Katara to join him at the turtleduck pond. The two of them walked down the stone path, and not a word was spoken until Katara plopped down onto the stone bench. Zuko remained standing, pacing angrily back and forth.

"Would you sit down! You're making me dizzy with all this pacing!"

Zuko stopped, running a hand across his face. "I'm sorry. I'm just so embarrassed about how those women treated you! My advisors must be playing a trick on me, sending you there. They had to know the animosity that you would face! I fully intend to have a talk with—"

"Zuko."

"—them and let them know just how they have disappointed me. And then I plan to—"

"Zuko!"

"What!" He threw his hands up in the air, spinning around to face her. He stood there fuming, taking large gulps of air, looking indignant.

Katara sighed and then spoke softly. "Look, why don't you just calm down. You don't need to do any of those things. It will be fine."

"No it won't! Those women should not be allowed to speak to you or about you in that way! It's unacceptable! You're an accomplished bender and healer! You're a war hero! For Agni's sake, you healed _me_! Is the person who healed their own Fire Lord not good enough for them?"

It was clear to Katara that a calm approach was not going to do it. Getting riled up herself, she raised her voice. "Zuko! What do you think will happen if you intervene? Then they'll just think that I am some weak girl who needs the Fire Lord to hold her hand and get special privileges."

Zuko found himself thinking for a moment how he wished she were the kind of girl who wanted to hold the Fire Lord's hand….but she was still talking, and he needed to pay attention. She was up and pacing now herself, the water in the pond following her unconsciously. The turtle ducks noticed the disturbance and quickly got out of the water to hide in the bushes.

"And another thing! I can take care of myself! I can do this job. I have spent the afternoon thinking of new and different ways to win these people over, and I don't need your help with it! I came here to help people and that's what I'm going to do. I've been overcoming difficult obstacles since long before you set eyes on the South Pole, and I'm not about to stop now just because a couple people were rude to me! " She crossed her arms and puffed out her chest, an insolent look on her face.

He knew she was right, but the frustration of the afternoon, coupled with the tense silences, and now culminating in shouting in a place that was supposed to be peaceful finally sent him over the edge. "FINE! Excuse me for interfering! I'm only the _Fire Lord_, what would I know about handling my own people!"

Not to let him have the last word, she exploded at him. "Yes! You are the Fire Lord! But just because you're the Fire Lord doesn't mean everyone loves you!"

Zuko narrowed his eyes and stalked toward her, stopping only when he was inches from her face, his breath warm on her skin. "Clearly," he seethed, spinning around and storming off toward his bed chambers.

Katara slumped down on the bench after he was out of sight, cradling her head in her hands. How had that gotten so out of control? She supposed it had been an emotionally harrowing day, but that was no excuse. He should know better than to try to coddle her! She could solve her own problems! She was so caught up in these thoughts that she didn't stop to consider what he had meant before he had stomped off. Frustrated, she stood and headed toward her own bed chambers. She had her first day of work at the clinic tomorrow, and she would show him – and everyone else - that she could handle this herself.

* * *

Even as an Earthbender, living underground got tiresome after awhile. People were not like the great badgermoles that taught earthbenders the art. They needed sunlight, and an environment that wasn't constantly damp and dismal. He had started to second guess his decision to join the group, lately, thinking that if another worm dropped from the 'ceiling' and down the back of his collar that would be the last straw. However, today was a very good day, and these things that he often grumbled to himself about were nowhere to be found as he made his way through the tunnels on the way to see their leader.

He approached the leader's quarters, which were flanked on both sides by guards, one waterbender and one firebender. The guards eyed him suspiciously.

"I have very important news for the Leader. Let me pass."

"What kind of news?" the guard to the left intoned.

"The kind that could lead to victory for us."

Before the guard could speak further, there was a shout from inside the Leader's quarters. The leader himself appeared at the doorway, peering at the man. "What is this news you bring?"

"Sir," he said with a bow, "I have news of Fire Lady Ursa."

The leader stepped out into the hallway long enough to grab the other man by the front of his tunic and pull him into his quarters. He was instructed to sit, and when he did, he found the Leader sitting across from him, staring intently. He spoke softly. "Boy, if you have news, it had better be substantiated."

"Sir, I intercepted this message from a boy who must have access to an aviary nearby. The message is from a woman they call the Seamstress in a town to the north. She wrote to the Fire Lord himself saying that she was coming home."

The Leader was silent for a time, which made the other man uncomfortable. When he finally spoke, he said, "Are you the only one who knows of this?"

"I am now."

The Leader did not have to question what this meant. "Has there been visual confirmation of the Fire Lady?"

"No, I came to request your permission to leave the bunker in order to make this confirmation."

"Permission granted. Do not allow for detection. If confirmed, do nothing without my approval. Is this understood?" The Leader's eyes spoke volumes of the penalties for failure.

"I will report back as soon as I have solid information. It must be tonight, however, as she is planning her journey to the Fire Nation very soon."

"Very well. Good luck." The Leader said, as he ushered the man out of his quarters.

The Leader watched the man go down the hallway. After he had gone, he read the scroll he had brought. The scroll looked legit, there was little doubt that this Seamstress and the Fire Lady were one in the same. She could change so much for the movement. He was brought out of his thoughts when one of the guards called to him.

"Sir?" the guard asked.

"Yes, what is it?" The Leader did not like to be bothered in moments such as this.

"Operatives in the Fire Nation Capitol have sent word that the Waterbender is staying at the palace as well as General Iroh. I was instructed to inform you of this immediately."

"As well you should have. Good work. Thank you." The Leader went back to his musings. So, the Waterbender and friend to Fire Lord Zuko was staying in the palace, along with General Iroh. This, with the possibility of finding Ursa, was looking more and more like divine providence.

Within a few hours, the man had returned with a positive identification of Fire Lady Ursa. He said that he had not been seen, but from glimpses through her windows, it looked as if she was packed and preparing to leave.

Addressing the guards, the Leader said, "Timing is of the essence in both of these cases. You know how to handle the Fire Lady. I will send word to our operatives in the Fire Nation regarding what their task is. This is coming together almost too nicely…"

* * *

Katara's first day at work had gone little better than her tour from the day before. She was still regarded with suspicion and mistrust among the women of the clinic, and by some of the patients. She was starting to warm up to one patient, however, and that was a start. If she could get just one person to allow her to heal them successfully, then perhaps the others would become increasingly comfortable. She had to start somewhere, regardless.

A new arrival had come in while she was treating a man with severe burns on his hands, and the new arrival was admitted to the empty bed next to her. Katara paid him no mind as he settled in, laying back on the futon and attempting to relax while holding his injured arm to his chest. She turned to him briefly to smile and say that she would attend to him in just a moment. Turning her back to the new arrival proved to be a mistake.

As soon as she had the healing water in her hands, the man from behind her delivered three sharp blows to various parts of her body. Katara spun, ready to defend herself with the water in her hands, but instead of obeying her commands, the water dripped through her fingers, pooling worthlessly on the floor.

"You – you blocked my chi, didn't you!" Katara was both flabbergasted and furious at once.

A few more carefully placed blows and Katara was helpless on the ground. The not-so-injured patient scooped her up off the floor and threw her over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. With her body limp, she couldn't even pound on him as she would have liked to in this moment. The one thing she could do was scream, and scream she did.

The noise gained the attention of the other women working at the clinic, as well as the guards that Zuko had assigned to escort Katara. They burst into the room she has occupied, but all that was left was the man being treated for burns, and a broken window. Glass was all over the floor and the futon that had been so recently vacated. The man with the burns looked at the guards who had rushed in, and pointed: "He took her! He jumped out the window, and as far as I can tell headed north."

The guards quickly deliberated about what to do. They had to bicker for a moment over rank and responsibility, before they finally decided who would have to tell the Fire Lord this news. The younger of the two guards nodded, understanding his task, and turned to run straight to the palace. The remaining guard questioned the man for a few more minutes before he jumped out the window himself, hoping to catch up to the man that had absconded with Katara.

* * *

Katara was displeased, to say the least. She was currently lying across the back of an ostrich-horse, still unable to move. She was reminded of a time similar to this one, although then it had been on a shirxui, and it was the Prince of the Fire Nation holding her in place, not this malingering bandit. She couldn't figure out what went wrong this time, or why she was being kidnapped in the first place. Things had been going along nicely at her job, building rapport with a patient or two, and then suddenly she had been attacked by this man. Once they had entered the countryside and her screaming would do no good, she tried to engage her kidnapper in conversation to try to figure out what was happening here. Unfortunately for Katara, her captor was silent as the grave. He bound her wrists and ankles so that when feeling returned to her limbs she wouldn't be able to run away or bend. Katara tried to focus on a plan of escape, but one didn't seem to be coming to mind. She considered that perhaps when they stopped (they had to stop sometime, right?) she might have more leverage.

As it were, she decided to at least familiarize herself with the landscape. She watched the scenery go by her, mostly fields and brush. They continued down their path at a leisurely pace, as though wherever they were going, there was no hurry. As the sun descended a little further in the sky, Katara swore she heard something else besides the insects in the field and the clopping of the ostrich-horses hooves on the gravel road. She held her breath, trying to figure out what it was. _There. I did hear something. Like an animal approaching…_

Before she knew it, she could see a rider in black approaching quickly on back of an ostrich horse. She swung her head forward, her captor was either oblivious to all this noise, or was unconcerned. They entered a portion of the path that was shaded by a copse of trees. When she swung her head back to look behind, she discovered that the ostrich horse was still running at them, but the rider had disappeared. She stared in the direction of the ostrich horse, trying to figure out what was going on, when her body was jarred by a sudden stop made by her captor. Looking to the front now, Katara could see the reason for the sudden stop. There stood Zuko, in his old blue spirit clothes, minus the mask, twin dao swords drawn. The man holding her hostage slowly got off his ostrich horse. He regarded Zuko, but did not speak. He reached over to loosen the bonds that held Katara to the animal, and she promptly fell to the ground. She lay there from her new vantage point, still bound and staring awkwardly around the ostrich horse's feet. Finally, Zuko broke the tense silence.

"Who are you? I demand that you release her!"

"In time, Zuko, in time," the man replied with nonchalance.

"How dare you address me so informally, sir. I am your Fire Lord, and I demand that you release her at once!"

"You are not my Fire Lord. But, if you wish, you can have the girl back." With that, he shrugged, and smacked the ostrich horse on the flank, causing it to flail about. Katara screamed as she tried to roll out of the way of its massive feet stomping on the ground. A few times she was not lucky enough to dodge the blows. As soon as all of this began, Zuko rushed the man, swords drawn, trying to get to Katara a quickly as he could. The man who kidnapped her did not appear to be a bender, but his evasive skills were masterful and his movements unpredictable. Finally Zuko was able to catch the man across the arm with one of his swords, causing him to stagger back. He grabbed the reins of his ostrich horse with one hand, and jumped on. Using the distraction, Zuko pulled Katara out from underneath the ostrich horse to the other side of the path. The kidnapper spurred his ostrich horse and rode quickly down the path until he was out of sight. Zuko looked in the direction he came, wanting to follow the man and bring him to justice, but his pressing concern was with Katara.

She had a large gash on one side of her face; from the looks of it, the ostrich horse had kicked her there. She was bruised and dirty, and appeared to have a similar injury to her leg, which was sticking out at an odd angle.

"Katara!" Zuko said, hoping she would hear him and wake up. No response. "_Katara_," he tried again more sternly, shaking her by the shoulders gently. Still no response. Panic began to march up his spine. He needed to do something, quickly. She wouldn't be able to heal herself while unconscious, so he needed to find someone who could. His nearest bet was the clinic from which they had just left. He gently picked her up and set her in front of him on his ostrich horse, and rode hard back to the town.

The clinic was in a state of confusion when they arrived. No one knew what had happened, except that the man had been admitted as a patient, but then had struck Katara and burst out the window, breaking it. Zuko was uninterested in their reconstruction of events just then, what he needed was for these women to stop gossiping and help Katara. "Excuse me! Ladies! One of your coworkers has been injured, and I require immediate assistance!" The workers shushed and stared at their Lord, not sure if they should volunteer or not.

Not wanting to play the royal card, he appealed to their natures instead. "Please, she would do the same and more for any of you. I know how some of you feel about her country of origin, but this should not matter. You are healers, and I bring to you a person who requires healing. Please, do your best."

The timid women slowly crept forward, and began to address the wounds and injuries Katara has sustained. The leader of the group began shouting out requests for medicines and materials, and the others quickly moved to get them. Satisfied that they were trying, Zuko stepped outside, where he knew one of his guards was waiting.

"What happened in there! Why was Katara left unguarded!" Zuko seethed, turning his anger at the situation on his guard.

"Sir, I don't know how it happened – "

"Well you had better find out. We need to know more about the people who would do such a thing. Go find one of the guards who was supposed to be with Katara at the time of the attack. Find out what he knows. Together, search the path that the thief took, and see if he left any clues behind that might reveal his identity. Go. Now."

"Yes, My Lord," he said and bowed, before going off to find the other guard.

Zuko turned on his heels and went back inside to tend to Katara. The women there had propped her up nicely in a bed, and she was no longer unconscious. She looked tired, no doubt from the pain treatment the women had administered, among other things. He approached the bed and kneeled down next to it. He looked up at her and smiled wanly. "What trouble have I gotten you into now, Katara?"

She looked at him and made a noise of protest, then smiled weakly. "Please Zuko, I find trouble on my own. And I would have had him if you hadn't shown up."

Zuko rolled his eyes. "Sure you would have." His eyes turned serious. "I'm sorry. I had no idea how dangerous this assignment was. If I had known, I never would have – "

"Zuko, come on, I'm a big girl, I told you before. Who do you think that guy was? I mean, who kidnaps a clinic worker, for spirits' sake!" Not thinking, she started to get up out of the bed, only to be reminded that her leg was not yet healed as pain shot up from the injured limb. She quickly sat back down. "Damn! Could you ask the women for a bowl of water? I've got to take care of this leg."

Zuko did as asked, returning with a bowl of water for her healing. She began working the water over the broken bone, the bright blue shimmer reflecting off of her face in a way that was enchanting. As quickly as it had begun, it was over, and the blue glow dissipated as the water dripped harmlessly to the floor. She smiled at him, rotating and testing the leg. "So, I think it's about time we find out who this guy is, so we can kick his kidnapper butt!"

He shook his head and smiled at her. "You should really get some rest. Why don't we relax a bit before there's any butt-kicking."

She flopped back down on the hospital bed with a loud sigh. "Zuko, the tyrant."

Just then, a guard approached at Zuko's left. "Sir, we searched the area, and found this." He handed a scroll to the Fire Lord, saluted, and left.

Katara was still muttering on her bed about needing rest, when Zuko shot up from where he was sitting, the scroll shaking in his hands.

"What is it Zuko?"

"It's my mother. They've found her. And I think she's in trouble."


	5. Chapter 4

Chapter 5

_A/N: Thanks to all the people who have reviewed or added this story to their alerts and favorites lists! While I receive personal enjoyment from writing this story, it makes me happy to see that other people are enjoying it as well. As I've noted earlier, since this is my first fanfic, I'm bound to make mistakes here and there. If I do, or if something isn't clear, let me know! I can never tell if I'm being too vague or beating you all over the head with plot points or if I'm moving too fast or slow. I appreciate feedback of all sorts as it helps me grow. Thank you for your patience with the updates, which I know have come at a glacial pace recently. I will try to do my best to post more frequently, but with the semester beginning again it's anyone's guess about how much time I'll be able to dedicate to writing for fun. Enough of all that though, on with the show, hope you enjoy!_

Note: I do not own Avatar the Last Airbender.

* * *

_Dearest Zuko,_

_There are so many things to say, many of which cannot be conveyed in a simple letter. I do not know what your father told you about my absence, if anything. I have longed to see you and tell you the truth, and it seems now that the time may finally be right. After my prolonged absence, I know you may have mixed feelings about seeing me, but I hope that you at least grant me the permission to apologize and explain the events that caused me to leave so abruptly. I will soon travel to the Fire Nation so that we can meet, if you so desire it. Even if you choose not see me, know that I love you and am proud of you. _

_Your Mother_

"What is it, Zuko?"

He did not even realize that he was standing until Katara said his name. His hands shook, and his heart raced. Could this be true? His mother was alive and wanted to see him? He had dreamed about this for years, it seemed almost too good to be true. And perhaps it was. Things didn't have a way of working out easily for Zuko, and his excitement quickly dissolved as he thought of potential difficulties. Zuko's mind raced with the whirlwind of possibilities and implications that this one scroll contained.

"It's my mother. They've found her. And I think she's in trouble."

"_What?_ Your mother? Are you sure?" Katara scrambled out of bed and raced to Zuko's side, peering at the letter in his hands. She read it over and then looked at him. "How can you be sure that it's from her?"

"I remember her meticulous handwriting. She would write stories for us at bedtime when we were kids. I would read the stories she wrote over and over until they practically disintegrated from so much handling," he paused, a smile touching his lips as he remembered, before continuing. "Anyway, I would know that writing anywhere. And then there's this." He flipped the letter over. "This was her seal. She must have taken it with her when she left. I have no doubt that this letter is from my mother."

"But…Zuko that's great news! Your mother is alive and she wants to see you!" She threw an arm around him and smiled. But when Katara searched Zuko's face, she saw concern instead of joy. Her smile faded. "But…wait. You said 'they've found her.' Who are 'they'?"

"I don't know, but for that guy to have it, the message had to be intercepted somewhere. If it was taken after she sent it, she might still be ok. She might not even know that it wasn't delivered and still be on her way. On the other hand, if the people who took this message knew how important she was, they might try to find her. They might hurt her, or kidnap her the same way they tried to kidnap you. I have to help her. I have to figure out if she is ok. I have-"

Noticing the panic creeping into his voice, Katara took him by the shoulders and looked him in the eye. "Zuko. Calm down. We're going to figure this out. But we can't do that until we can think about this in a calm and logical way."

Zuko looked confused. "We?"

"Yes, 'we'. Don't be ridiculous. This is something that's very important to you, and of course I'm going to help you find her." She looked away briefly, as though embarrassed. "That is, of course, if you want me to. I never turn my back on people who need me, right?" She smiled at him, but he stared blankly at her. "Oh, right, you weren't there for that. Never mind. Anyway, before we do anything, I suggest we calm down and develop a plan. Let's talk to Uncle Iroh first, he might have some ideas."

_Can't argue with that._ He let out a long sigh in an attempt to release some of his anxiety. "Yes, I suppose you're right." He turned to leave, but then stopped, the afternoon's events catching up with him. "Wait. Are you well enough to travel back to the palace so soon?"

"Of course. Hello, waterbending master here! You wouldn't have given me this clinic job if I didn't have any healing talents." This time, she got a small smile out of him. "Let's just get over there. I'm as excited as you are to figure out what all of this means. Come on." She looped an arm around his and led him toward the waiting palanquin. At the doorway, she looked over her shoulder and made eye contact with the head nurse.

"I quit."

* * *

When they arrived back at the palace, Zuko informed the nearest servant to locate General Iroh and have him report to Zuko's personal study immediately. Katara politely requested that tea be delivered as well. The two of them wound their way through great halls. Zuko kept getting odd looks from people as he went, likely because he was stalking around the palace in black attire with swords strapped onto his back instead of wearing his traditional robes. Finally, they came upon a gilded door. Zuko gestured for Katara to come inside, and offered her a seat. The room itself was beautiful, containing a fireplace, a seating area for guests, and a large mahogany desk that sat in front of a window overlooking the courtyard. However, unlike many of the rooms in the palace that had a museum-like quality, this room was clearly lived in. Paperwork was piled haphazardly on the desk, and a large map on the wall of the four nations was covered in pins and scribbling. The mantle of the fireplace had a thin coating of dust, suggesting that the servants were either lax in their duties or not allowed to enter this room. Katara supposed it was the latter. She smiled a little at the state of the room, thinking of how fastidious Zuko normally was. _He must really be busy if he doesn't have time to organize all of this, _she thought.

Zuko could see her eyeballing the mountain of paper on his desk, and his hands itched to tidy the stacks. Normally, the chaos of his office didn't bother him; he had tried to keep it organized when he first became Fire Lord, but he quickly learned that this was a losing battle. He and Uncle Iroh were really the only people who ever came inside, so he didn't often think about what it would look like to others. Upon closer inspection, he noticed a crimson ribbon peeking out from between some documents. _The necklace!_ Panic started to radiate within him. Zuko remembered finding it on his desk after his conversation with Uncle Iroh. He had been so disgusted by the whole thing that he had just thrown some papers on top of it, obscuring it from sight and causing him to forget about it completely. Zuko also remembered Toph saying something about Katara having a propensity to snoop, so he knew he had to get to it. Trying not to appear obvious, he started inching toward his desk. Suddenly there was a knock at the door. Katara smiled.

"That must be the tea. I'll get it, I'm closer."

Jumping at the opportunity, Zuko raced to the desk, shuffling the papers so he could reach the necklace while Katara was distracted. He heard her thank the servant making the delivery, and the clanking of the tea tray as she set it down. He had just gotten his hands on the thing when Katara spoke from behind him.

"Are you looking for something Zuko? I could help-"

"No! I mean no, that's ok, I was just...tidying up some of these papers." He turned around to face her, smiling innocently, hands behind his back. He hoped he wasn't blushing.

She looked at him skeptically. "Right. What kind of tea would you like then?"

Zuko let out a sigh of relief before replying. While she was distracted with pouring the tea, Zuko quickly stuffed the offending necklace into his sleeve. More pesky images of Katara and the Avatar laughing at him popped into his mind as he imagined what would have happened if she had seen it.

Iroh walked in just as Katara handed Zuko his cup of tea. She poured one for the General and for herself, and then they all sat down, ready to discuss the task at hand.

"So, Nephew," Iroh began, "What is the emergency? I will have you know I was in the middle of a very heated game of Pai Sho with the head cook."

Zuko restrained himself from rolling his eyes. "Trust me Uncle, you want to hear this." He quickly recounted the events of the afternoon, and then passed the scroll to Iroh, who unfurled it and read it quickly. He looked back up at Zuko, smiling. "It looks as if Lady Ursa is finally coming home. How wonderful!"

"But Uncle, this scroll was not delivered through the usual routes. It is believed to be one of the belongings that the kidnapper left at the scene. Why would he have had a letter from my mother?"

"Now Zuko, do not jump to conclusions. Remember the last time we talked about making assumptions?"

The necklace in his sleeve felt heavier. But Zuko remained focused and ignored his uncle's cryptic reference to the situation between Katara and the Avatar. "Uncle, I need to make sure that nothing untoward has befallen my mother. The fact that her message was intercepted indicates the possibility that she may be in danger. Katara has agreed to accompany me in investigating her whereabouts."

Iroh frowned. "Zuko, she may be fine. She said in her letter that she is on her way here. Just because her letter was intercepted does not necessarily mean that she was similarly detained. Why don't you remain here and wait for her arrival?"

Zuko was trying to remain calm, and failing miserably. This conversation was not going the way he hoped it would. "Uncle, don't you understand? She could be in trouble! We have to help her!"

Katara spoke up. "All due respect, General Iroh, but I think Zuko's right. That kidnapping might not have been a coincidence. If the two are related somehow, there is the possibility that she could be in danger."

Iroh nodded. "Very astute, Miss Katara. But that is all the more reason to stay here, and wait for any news of her. If this is part of some larger plot, it could be very dangerous. You are the Fire Lord, Zuko. While you have youth and skill on your side, you cannot risk yourself by possibly walking into a trap. Let some of your men investigate and see what they find. Do not act rashly on the basis of one letter."

Zuko kicked a chair. "One letter? _One letter?_ Uncle, this is the first clue I've had of my mother's existence since she disappeared! I absolutely _must_ pursue it, and find out if she is ok!" Smoke plumed from his nostrils. In that moment, they were all reminded of a boy with a ponytail and a small ship scouring the south seas.

With a heavy heart, Iroh gave it one last try. "Zuko, I know how important this is to you. But you have responsibilities here. You cannot just abandon them."

Zuko kneeled down in front of Iroh. "Uncle, please, I need to do this. She's my mother. How can I abandon her if I think she might be in trouble? Please, just for a week or two, stay here and look after my responsibilities. If we find nothing, at least I will be able to tell myself I tried. I can't sit by idly if she is in danger. It would be dishonorable." Begging was unbecoming of him, but theurgency of the situation overrode any sense of decorum. He almost felt ashamed doing so in front of Katara, until he remembered she had seen this once before.

There was a long pause. Zuko stared up at his uncle, eyes pleading, holding his breath. Iroh sighed heavily, and closed his eyes. When he reopened them, his eyes lingered for a long time behind Zuko on Katara. Something in his face changed, he seemed to have come to a decision. He shifted his gaze back at Zuko, and smiled a little sadly. "You're right Zuko. This is something you must do. I will remain here at the palace for a while longer and look after your responsibilities for a time. But please remember I have responsibilities of my own back in Ba Sing Se, and I cannot neglect them for long. While you are gone, I will investigate from this end. Please keep me informed of your progress and I will do the same. And above all, please be careful."

Zuko launched himself at his Uncle, trapping the man in a strong embrace and thanking him profusely. Katara stood back smiling, letting them have their moment. When they parted, Iroh cleared his throat, and asked, "So, what do you plan to do?"

* * *

Toph had mixed feelings. As she loaded her things onto Appa, there were a few emotions vying for dominance in her mind. She was glad to be leaving the North Pole. The people were pleasant enough, but she was ready to be back with her element so she could see again. And she was excited to be visiting the Fire Nation. She had liked it there, when there weren't, you know, constant threats of death. Seeing Sparky and Pops was always good for a laugh, especially when Pops brought out the suungi horn and the palm wine. And seeing Katara wasn't so bad now that they got along, but….she'd have to see Katara and Aang. Together. A few weeks ago at the party in Ba Sing Se, Toph could "see" what was going on out on that patio. She knew now that Twinkletoes was going to get what he had always wanted. Why Katara wasn't here with Aang at this moment was still a bit of a mystery, but she knew what she saw out there, there could be no mistake. She knew she should be happy for them, and part of her was, but the other part was, well, a little hurt. She thought that maybe she and Aang…no, forget it. That's just stupid. She berated herself for getting so worked up over a boy. She was the world's greatest earthbender, and she did _not_ get sad over dumb boys. Who needed them? She mentally congratulated herself for coming to this conclusion. They would go to the Fire Nation, she would have a good time and torture Zuko a little, and that would be that. With a new sense of resolve, she called to Aang to hurry up so they could be on their way.

* * *

Zuko loaded the last of their things into the balloon. He figured that they should travel lightly and inconspicuously. If they wanted to find information, they needed to blend in. Taking the royal procession had been out of the question. No, the balloon would be the fastest way to reach the Western Earth Kingdom, their first stop. From there they would travel on foot or by ostrich horse. As they found clues, they would send Uncle Iroh messages from each stopping point so that he could track their journey and alert him of any news. Yes, Zuko had it all planned out.

Katara walked out to the area where the balloon was docked. There was Zuko, dressed in his old traveling clothes. It was refreshing to see him in them again, so much so that it almost felt like old times. She watched him load the last of their things, and then pull a long sheet of paper out of his robes, examining it. She approached him, and looked over his shoulder to read it. Her face dropped.

"Oh no, is that an itinerary? No, no, no, you just put that away right now. Don't you remember what we went through when Sokka had one of those?" He stared at her blankly. "Oh, I suppose you wouldn't, you weren't with us yet. I keep forgetting. Well let me just tell you these are nothing but trouble. Here, let me relieve you of this."

She proceeded to grab the edge of the paper and try to playfully wrestle it away from him. With a quick tug, he pulled it out of her hand and then held it above his head. She couldn't quite reach as high as he could, so she tried to jump for it. This proved a bad idea, as on her third attempt she tripped and fell full force into the Fire Lord. The momentum propelled them both backward, and Zuko landed on his back with a thump, followed by Katara on top of him. Katara froze in mortification, until she heard Zuko start to chuckle. "Look, if you want it that bad, it's yours." He flung out an arm with the paper in his hand. She reached for it, and he used this opportunity to fling her over and pin her instead. They were both laughing now, and he smiled as he looked down on her. Then he remembered this was the Avatar's girlfriend, and flirting with her would be disgraceful. He quickly rolled off of her, and stood up, trying to compose himself. He glanced at Katara, who was dusting off her clothes. He thought he could detect a blush on her cheeks, but quickly dismissed it.

"Um, shall we, uh, depart soon?" He looked everywhere but at her.

"Yeah, I supposed we should. Do we have everything we need?" Katara asked.

"Yes, I checked off everything that was on the list. Unless, of course, you have a similar aversion to lists?" He teased.

Katara stuck her tongue out at him.

They were on their way.

* * *

Air travel by balloon to the Western Earth Kingdom was to take two days. At the end of the first day, they would make camp on one of the Fire Nation islands to the east, before proceeding to the Earth Kingdom the next day. They had been in the air for a few hours, and little had been said since their departure. There was little to do on the balloon, and Zuko was reminded of the awkward silences he experienced with her brother when they flew to the Boiling Rock. He shot more fire into the engines, and looked over at Katara. She was seated near the edge of the basket, arms pillowed beneath her chin, looking off into the distance. Following her line of sight, he too watched as the Fire Nation gradually fell away as they flew. He was about to make a comment about the scenery, when Katara spoke.

"Do you really think we'll find your mother?"

"I don't know." Zuko sounded unsure of himself.

"You don't know? What's that supposed to mean?"

"I mean, I hope so. I just don't know if we'll be successful. From her letter, all we know is that she isn't already in the Fire Nation. That's a start, but that still leaves a lot of options open."

"So where do we even begin?"

"I'm not worried about that part. I know exactly where to start this search, even though I have no idea where it will lead us from there. Our first stop is the Western Earth Kingdom. I know someone there who is excellent at finding people, particularly those who do not wish to be found. I believe you remember Jun?"

Katara's mouth dropped open. "Jun? The woman with the whip and giant mole that paralyzes people with its tongue? _That_ Jun?"

"Ah, I see you remember her quite well."

"How could I not! First, there was that time at the abbey, when you had used my mother's necklace to track us. And then the second time when we were looking for Aang..." She trailed off, as though remembering something. Zuko noticed her expression change to one that he could not discern. _Did she miss him? Was that it?_

"At any rate, yes, we will be employing Jun's services to try to find where my mother was living. From there, we will have to follow the clues that will lead us to her."

Katara quirked an eyebrow at Zuko. "How do you know where to find Jun?"

Zuko shrugged. "The war might be over, but crime persists as always. Sometimes we hire her to track people for us."

Katara was silent for a minute. Then she thought of something.

"Wait, do you have something that belonged to your mother, so her mole-thing can smell it?"

Zuko produced a knapsack, and inside was a small bundle of silk. He carefully unwrapped it to reveal a tarnished crown, but not like any Katara had ever seen. He handed it to Katara for her to inspect.

"This doesn't look like the crown you wear." Katara stated as she turned it over in her hand.

"No, it wouldn't. It has a long history, actually. It was originally Prince Sozin's crown, before he became Fire Lord. At that time, before there was a war between the nations, he and Avatar Roku were friends. Sozin gave this crown to Roku before he left to train as the Avatar. The crown was passed down and ended up with my mother, as Roku was her grandfather. I never saw her wear it, but Uncle Iroh remembers a time before she married Ozai when she wore it frequently. It's the only thing I could think of in the palace that might still have her scent on it."

"Wow. Your great-grandfather was Avatar Roku?" Zuko nodded and Katara was left to digest this new piece of information. She looked back down at the crown, and then turned her attention suddenly at Zuko. "Hey, if you've had this the whole time, why didn't you just hire Jun as soon as you became Fire Lord?"

Zuko's brow furrowed. "I tried. But Jun wouldn't take the job. She said something about not being in the business of finding those who want to remain hidden if they've done no wrong."

Katara smirked. "Who knew Jun had any sense of morality? Or ethics?"

"I think she used the phrase 'honor among thieves,' or something like that." Zuko scoffed.

Katara looked at Zuko skeptically. "So what makes you think she'll help you this time?"

"The situation has changed. My mother wants to be found. Her letter confirms it. Any reasons that Jun had before aren't applicable anymore. It's worth a try at least."

Katara smiled and handed the crown back to Zuko. "Well, I hope she'll be willing to help us this time, despite what you've said."

Zuko gestured toward the lower deck of the air balloon. "Well, even if we can't appeal to her morality, I've got a few bags of gold with her name on it that might change her mind."

Katara laughed while Zuko added more fire to the engines.

* * *

"Camping! Just like old times. And just when I thought I'd get to sleep in a real bed for awhile…" Katara said wistfully as she laid out their sleeping bags.

They had arrived on one of the islands in the east, ready to camp for the night before making the final leg of the journey. The sun was setting as she and Zuko set up camp. Not much else needed to be done except build a fire for cooking.

"Oh, come off it, you know you missed this." Zuko teased, setting down the firewood he had found. He began arranging the wood in the fire pit.

"Oh yes, the constant making and breaking of camp, the lack of baths, the rocks poking me through my sleeping bag. I'd have to be crazy not to miss this."

"It wasn't all bad, and you know it. You got to see the world, help people. You got to help Aang. You should be proud of your travelling, despite the discomforts."

Katara sighed. "I know. And there were some good times…Hey, wait a minute, you're looking at the bright side of things! Who are you and what have you done with Zuko!" She began looking around wildly in a mock search.

"Oh calm down, you'll just embarrass me, and then I'll never be optimistic again." He smirked. He had gotten the fire started and began to unpack the supplies they would need to make a meal.

After they had finished eating, they lay back in their sleeping bags, looking at the stars. Zuko was reminded of their walks on the beach, and their late night conversations at his mother's turtle duck pond. He was also painfully aware that they were completely alone together. Suddenly the teasing and the easy way he talked to her disappeared, and he felt awkward. His feelings for her had not diminished in the least, even though he knew it wasn't meant to be. As much as he tried, he couldn't figure out how to silence this attraction he had, couldn't figure out a way to just be happy for them. In an attempt to distract himself, he thought of the matter at hand: finding his mother. He rolled over to look at Katara. "Hey, I've been thinking about something."

She rolled over to face him as well.

Zuko sighed, and began. "I…well I think what you said when we were talking to Uncle Iroh was right. I don't think the kidnapping was a coincidence. I mean, if it was just a random kidnapping, why not kidnap any of the clinic workers? But they didn't. They kidnapped you. Sure, you're a war hero, so you are easily recognized, but it's also no secret that we're friends. They must have known I would find out about the incident at least."

"What are you implying, Zuko?"

"Look I don't want to scare you, but I think there were clear reasons why you were targeted. As you noted, he was travelling pretty slowly, like he wanted to be caught. Like he didn't really want to succeed in kidnapping you. Even that guy's attitude was strange. What did he say, "you're not my Fire Lord?" or something like that. And then he just happens to leave this letter behind for us to find. This whole thing reeks of a set-up. It seems clear that whoever these people are they wanted me to know two things: one, that they have some information on my mother, and two that I had better tighten my security because they know how to get to the people I care about. I'm a little worried about what we are going to find when we dig deeper into this. Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe we should just go back and send out some men to search like Uncle Iroh suggested." He flopped back down into his sleeping bag covering his face with his right hand.

"No, Zuko, it wasn't a mistake. She's your mother. You know you wouldn't be able to rest until you know she's safe. It's ok to be scared, but we have to find her." She smiled, reaching out to put her hand over his left one. "And we have to find out more about these people involved. If there are people plotting against you, we need to know who they are and how powerful they are. Think of it as a two-for-one: you'll get to find your mom, and take down some bad guys in the process."

Zuko smiled a little and peeked out from between two fingers. "Now who's the optimist?"

She released his hand and smacked his arm playfully. "Unlike you, I rather like being the optimistic one. After all, didn't that stupid play say that I gave flowery speeches about hope all the time?"

"I guess it did say that." Under his breath he grumbled: "Among other things."

"What?"

Zuko rolled over so that he was facing away from her. "Nothing. Good night, Katara."

Katara stared at him for a bit before settling down into her sleeping bag once more.

* * *

Ursa hiked the bag she was carrying a little higher on her shoulder as she made her way up the gangplank of the ship. Her possessions were few, her modest pieces of furniture had been left behind, but the bag full of clothing and a few trinkets was awkward to carry.

The vessel she was boarding belonged to one of the residents of the village she was from. He used his vessel to transport various foodstuffs to parts of the Earth Kingdom and occasionally to the Water Tribes. She overheard him talking a few days before in the tavern about heading south along the western coast of the continent, and spoke to him about securing passage on the ship. He was shocked at her request, as she never really spoke to anyone, and that she would have a need to leave the village at all. But he respected her privacy and didn't pry any further. She had constructed beautiful robes for his daughter's wedding, and he felt he owed her the favor. He granted her a cabin on his ship to wherever she needed to go, refusing her money when she offered it. Ursa had thanked him for his kindness.

She was able to locate her cabin on the main deck. It was small and sparse, but well kept. A simple cot occupied one wall, as well as a chair and a basin for washing. She set down her bag and lay down on the bed. Her head ached a little, she thought perhaps she should get some rest. As she rubbed her temples, she discovered a knot on the side of her head that hurt when she applied pressure to it. This was curious, as she had no memory of hitting her head. But then, there were a few things about last night that she couldn't piece together either.

She had been at the tavern, partly out of habit and partly to say a personal goodbye to the place. She had spent many evenings there and had grown to be quite fond of it over time. She listened to the conversations around her, drank her tea as always, and then got up to leave. She woke the next morning in her own bed with no memory of how she had gotten there.

She shook it from her mind. No matter. She didn't have to worry about anyone from that village anymore. She was on her way to the Fire Nation to be reunited with her son, who she had longed to see for so many years. The ship she was on would stop at multiple ports along the western coast, and from one of those she could surely secure passage on a vessel heading to the Fire Nation. She wasn't sure how long it would take, but she knew that with patience she would arrive at her destination.

The ships engines began to rumble, and she knew they were ready to depart. Her headache abating, she curled up on the cot and went to sleep.

* * *

Zuko and Katara arrived in a town in the Western Earth Kingdom by the next evening. Jun wasn't difficult to find. As the locals were quite familiar with the raven-haired bounty hunter and her Shirshu, Katara and Zuko only had to ask a few residents before being directed to a location at the edge of town. Travelling up a dirt path, they saw a tavern that was surrounded by burly and raucous men. Lively music along with shouting and the sound of breaking glass could be heard from inside. Glancing at one another, they knew instinctively that this had to be the place. A sense of déjà vu passed through them as they entered. Sitting at a table surrounded by empty mugs and towers of coins was Jun. She tossed back the rest of what was in one of the mugs and spotted them.

"Hey! If it isn't the spoiled prince." She looked over the two of them with whiskey-glazed eyes as they approached. "And his girlfriend has come along with him again. Ain't that just sweet."

"She is not my girlfriend!" Zuko yelled.

The entire bar went silent for a beat and heads turned their way.

Jun threw back her head and laughed. It was then that Zuko realized that he had yelled the statement alone. Unlike the last time they were in this position, Katara did not join in with a vehement denial. Feeling the blood rush to his face, he turned to Katara. "I mean, I thought, I – "

"Oh save it Prince Charming," Jun said as she composed herself. "I was only kidding with you anyway. Will you ever learn to take a joke?" She turned for a minute to order another drink. "I imagine this isn't a social call, so what is it you want from me this time?"

Zuko got back to the task at hand, hoping the previous scene would be forgotten. "I need you to find my mother."

Jun rolled her eyes, her next words spoken slowly as though she were talking to a child. "Princey, we've been over this a thousand times. When she wants to be found, she will be. She's not breaking any laws. I won't take the job."

Zuko pulled the letter from his mother out of his robes. "But that's just it. She does want to be found. And I need to make sure that I find her first."

Jun scanned the letter and handed it back. She sighed, and began to play with one of the stacks of coins on the table disinterestedly. "Well, if that's what she wants, then I suppose I could take the bounty." She shot a glance at Zuko. "And what type of bounty_ will_ you be providing, Lord Zuko?"

"None at all if you don't stop referring to me by my titles!" Zuko said through clenched teeth, noticing the attention they were attracting. "But I do have money, and if you deem that it is sufficient, then we would like to be on our way by morning."

"Fair enough. You got something for Nyla to smell?" Zuko nodded. "Well, then, meet me at sunrise with it and we'll be on our way. In the meantime, you better find a place to stay for the night. I would recommend that one across the street."

Katara and Zuko exited the tavern and looked at the inn across the street. Katara made a face, and Zuko made a noise of contempt. Questionable looking people were milling about outside the inn, with a few passed out drunk on the porch. Zuko turned around to ask Jun if there was another option, but she had vanished. He turned back to Katara. "What do you think? I mean, we could try to find somewhere else…"

"Yeah, we could, but we may as well stay here. The rates have to be cheap enough, right?" Katara asked, hugging her arms.

Zuko shrugged. "Ok, I'll go talk to the owner about a room. I'll be right back."

Katara waited outside, watching the tavern across the street as a few inebriated men came out and stumbled toward home. She couldn't imagine living like Jun and wondered what the appeal was for her. Katara wasn't comfortable in places like that for more than five minutes, but to Jun they were a second home. Katara then began to wonder where home was for Jun, or if she even had one at this point. Perhaps she was nomadic, and just went wherever there was work, whiskey, and gambling. Just thinking of it reminded Katara how much she wanted to abandon the rootless lifestyle at least for a little while. That's what she thought would happen when she came to the Fire Nation. She figured that she would stay for a few months, get to sleep in a nice warm bed, and do some good for some people while spending some time with Zuko. This trip was turning into something she didn't anticipate, but she didn't begrudge Zuko the need to find his mother, and was in fact excited to be going on this journey with him. He was there for her when they tracked down Yan Rha, it seemed fitting that they go look for Lady Ursa together. _Together, I like how that sounds, _she mused.

A tap on her shoulder brought her out of her musings, and when she turned around there stood Zuko. "I've gotten a place for us to stay." He had his own bag slung over one shoulder, and reached down to take hers as well.

"Zuko, I can carry my own bag." Katara protested.

"I know. But trust me, when you see the room you'll realize that this is the least that I could do."

He was right. She opened the door to the room, and immediately a foul smell hit her full force. The cramped room contained a single bed big enough for two, a tiny dirty window, and a washbasin. The bed sheets looked threadbare and had unidentifiable stains. A quick look around, and Katara knew she had a fair bit of waterbending to do in order to make this room even partially habitable. She started by opening a small window to let in some fresh air. She uncorked her waterskins and got to work weaving the water through the sheets on the bed. When finished, her bending water had turned a murky gray color, but at least she might feel comfortable sleeping on the bed now. She sighed and sat down on the bed, realizing for the first time that there was only _one_ bed in this room. She looked at Zuko, who was arranging their things in one corner of the room.

"Uh, so, is this our room – I mean, did you get one for me and one for you or - there's only one bed, so-" Katara sputtered.

Zuko looked up from what he was doing. "I'm sorry. The innkeeper said that they only had one room available. The rates were cheap though, like you thought they might be."

The fact that he seemed unfazed by the single bed only managed to increase her anxiety for some reason. She took a deep breath, trying to focus her thoughts so that she could explain the problem to him more clearly, when he spoke up.

"Don't worry, you can have the bed. I'll just use one of our sleeping rolls and sleep on the floor."

She felt guilty for a moment, and something else. Disappointment? No, that couldn't be it, right? She tried to hedge with him. "That's ok, I mean, you can have the bed if you want—"

"No, don't worry about it. You did all the work cleaning the sheets, you should be the one to enjoy it." He proceeded to unroll one of the sleeping bags in the space he had cleared.

"But I didn't do that just for me! We could share it!" Katara blurted. She immediately flushed a deep red. _Where had that come from? That's not what I meant at all! _

To his credit, Zuko looked appropriately horrified at the idea, mostly because he was imaging the Avatar's wrath if he were ever to discover that Zuko had shared a bed with his girlfriend. "No, no! That's ok! You can have it, I'm perfectly fine on the floor here!" He quickly jumped into his sleeping roll and turned to face away from her.

Already embarrassed by her awkward suggestion, she now felt even more ridiculous at his rejection of the idea. Feeling indignant, she said, "Oh, so you're too good to share a bed with a Water Tribe peasant, is that it?"

"Katara, I didn't say that!" He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I just don't think that it would be…appropriate. Look, just go to sleep, I'm fine here. Please. Just go to sleep."

She made a hrumph noise and fell back into the bed. Appropriate? What was that supposed to mean? She had half a mind to ask him, but when she looked to the floor where he was, he appeared to already be asleep. Well, she'd just have to scold him about it in the morning. She rolled over, still feeling a little rejected, and finally fell asleep.

* * *

Zuko rose with the sun as usual. He sat up slowly and stretched, listening to the small bones in his back pop from sleeping on the wooden floor. After sleeping in his soft bed in the palace, his body was unused to spending nights on the ground, despite his previous years travelling. Part of him regretted turning down Katara's offer to share the bed with him, even though he knew it was a bad idea. He was sure she meant it in the most innocent way, but the Avatar might not see it that way if he were ever to catch wind of such a thing. Standing up, he glanced over at the still sleeping Katara. Though the bed was made to fit two people, she had taken over the entire space. Her body was angled diagonally across the bed, limbs splayed, hair trailing the floor where her head hung off the bed a bit. Zuko cringed, thinking of the dust and grime that her hair would attract, but knew that fixing it might wake her, and he knew better than to wake a sleeping waterbender. As he watched, she snorted in her sleep and rolled over into a tight ball. He laughed to himself, thinking that it was a good thing that he had declined her offer after all; it appears he would have ended up on the floor either way.

Knowing there were a few things they would need for the subsequent trip, he left the room, shutting the door quietly behind him. There was little activity on the streets this early in the morning, and Zuko enjoyed the peace this brought. His first stop was to the local aviary to send a message to his Uncle alerting them of their current position and progress. He purchased a few mangoes from a street vendor so they would have breakfast, and then went in search of a stable. While they had most of the supplies they would need, they had no form of transportation. They couldn't follow Jun in the balloon; that would remain docked here in the village while they conducted their search. He had no desire to ride Nyla again, and didn't think that Jun would allow it anyway. Luckily, he found a merchant with two healthy ostrich horses for sale at a reasonable price. He walked them back to the inn and tied them to a post out front. His last stop was to the docks to gather a few more supplies from the balloon, which he brought back and arranged in the ostrich horses' saddlebags. By the time he completed these tasks it was almost midmorning and he figured he should wake Katara so they could be on their way.

He opened the door to the room and at first didn't see Katara anywhere. Stepping across the threshold into the room, he was greeted with a loud cry coming from his right before his feet were yanked out from under him.

He let out a surprised yelp, dropping the bag of fruit he was carrying and landing hard on his tail bone. Looking toward the source of the cry, he saw Katara in the corner of the room coming out of a bending stance. With a quick motion she returned the water she had used to trip him with to her waterskin and moved to help him up off of the floor.

"Zuko! I'm so sorry! I didn't know it was you!"

Irritation replaced his initial shock as he stood up, collecting their breakfast off the floor. "Who else could it have been?" he shouted.

Her embarrassment at accidentally attacking him faded with his raised voice and she shouted back. "I don't know! You're the one who chose this creepy place to stay. When I heard noises outside the door I thought maybe someone was going to rob us! You could have at least knocked or something."

"I didn't choose to stay here! _I_ suggested we look elsewhere, but _you_ said we should stay here because it would be cheap! I—"

"Lover's quarrel? So early in the morning?" said a voice behind them.

Katara and Zuko both swung their attention toward the door, which had been left wide open. Leaning against the doorframe was a smirking Jun. She sauntered in a few steps while Zuko and Katara stared at her, speechless.

"Sorry to interrupt. I asked the inn keeper which room you were staying in. I figured you guys would be anxious to get on the road. You can find me outside when you finish with your little spat." She smiled and turned on her heel, heading down the hall toward the front of the building.

Katara looked after her and then turned to Zuko, shooting him a look that indicated this was clearly all his fault, although he couldn't be sure how or what he was even being blamed for. She quickly gathered her things and swept past him out of the room. Pinching his nose in frustration, he let out a sigh and then followed suit.

Once outside, he motioned Katara toward the ostrich horses he had obtained, and she chose one without comment. He rummaged through one of his bags before finding his mother's crown. Unwrapping it, he handed it to Jun.

"Will this do?" he asked.

"We'll see." Jun cautiously held the object in front of Nyla's nose, letting the creature lock onto the scent. Nyla sniffed wildly at the air, shifting this way and that as she differentiated the scent from all others, following an invisible trail. She finally settled down facing one direction. Jun seemed to pick up on some clue that Nyla was finished, and she stroked the animal's neck while providing praise. Jun turned to Zuko and Katara.

"We ride north."

* * *

Shadows danced on the walls of Ozai's cell, cast by torches hung on the walls outside the bars. He sat motionless on the floor, staring unwaveringly at the flames. To the guards assigned to his post, it was unnerving how much time he spent in this activity. He had developed an eerie calm about him after the news of his daughter's death months ago. He rarely spoke, he complied with all requests, and he no longer tried to break free of his cell or the chains that bound him. By all accounts, he was a model prisoner, albeit a silent one. Stripped of his firebending and now seemingly lacking his previous rage, there was little to be intimidated by. If asked, his guards would say that they followed all designated protocols, but the unspoken truth was that many felt the precautions unnecessary; this man was harmless. Some took secret pleasure in his current state, and some felt shame at their previous alliance with him. Others wished for his return to the throne, despite his pathetic appearance. Regardless of their differing feelings toward him, all the guards could agree that this post was an easy one.

A lack of windows in this part of the prison made it impossible to tell the time of day. Instead, the rhythm of the days was set by the arrival and departure of three shifts of guards. The day shift could be seen coming up the halls, meaning it must be lunchtime. Two guards approached to relieve the previous shift, one carrying a tray with soup and a cup of tea. After greeting one another, the previous shift left for the day, leaving the two alone with Ozai. The guard without the tray fumbled in his pocket before producing the keys to the prisoner's cell in order to deliver his food. Before he could get the key in the lock, however, the other spoke up.

"Wait."

"What is it?"

"The cook must have made a mistake. There's no bread on that tray."

"I guess there isn't. So what?"

"All prisoners are to receive bread at every meal. It's part of the code."

The man with the keys rolled his eyes. "Oh come on, he won't notice just this one time. Isn't that right Ozai?"

Ozai made no indication that he had heard. He continued to stare at the torches as he had done all morning.

"See? He won't care. Let's just let it slide." He made to unlock the cell once again.

"No! Go back upstairs and get the bread. To deny a prisoner basic rights of nutrition would be dishonorable."

He threw his hands up in the air in frustration. "But I can't just leave you here alone with him! You know the protocol, no fewer than two men must be in place to guard him at all times. How would I explain leaving my post to a superior officer if asked?"

"I _am_ your superior officer, and I'm telling you to go upstairs and get the damn bread! Stop being ridiculous, nothing will happen in the five minutes that you are gone. Go. Quickly."

The guard made a face and hesitated, but in the end he pocketed his keys and took off at a sprint down the hallway. As soon as he was out of sight, the remaining guard turned to Ozai.

"Sir. News from the Leader. Things are falling into place quite nicely. You may be interested to know that your wife has been located, and her sudden appearance will aid greatly in moving the plan forward. More reports are forthcoming." With that, the guard turned around to wait for the other to return.

Inside his cell, Ozai smiled.


End file.
